I’m just going to lay this on the line. I’m a dork. A big one. I’m a mix of awkward, earnest, silly, passionate, scholarly, artistic, and an octopus for good measure.
I’ve always been this way, but the biggest difference between 20-something me and 40-something me is that I’ve learned to embrace it. And it has truly made life so much more enjoyable all around.
It doesn’t mean that I don’t take things seriously. My approach to art, dance, witchcraft – is very sincere and grounded. Technique, history, application, practice – any of these in any area of expertise will launch me into TELLING YOU ALL THE THINGS. (#geminiproblems)
Rather, I don’t fall into the trap of taking myself too seriously. Or the Universe for that matter. If you think the Universe – as in the flow of things, the deities, life, reality – is for the super Serious, it’ll strive to prove you wrong. It celebrates the odd, the absurd, boundary pushing, and juxtaposition – and it does it with a side helping of smug snark.
How did I learn this? Through the power of observation combined with cause and effect – in ritual, in practice, in dreams, and adding up circumstances. Like the time at one of the Cauldron of Annwyn’s public labyrinth rituals, while singing the Samhain fire song with extra gusto – that we managed to set the table on fire. (That year was best subtitled, “Fun with Elementals!) Or any time I’ve ever been at an event with a raffle, happen to look up from my table at whatever is on the block and go “oh I so do NOT want that thing, WTF would you do with it?”, moments later it’s mine. (This doesn’t work with things you actually want. I’ve tested it.)
I bring this all up for a few reasons. One is because everywhere I see examples of people trying so damn hard to appear to be serious – or at least perceived as such is my guess. But I’m here to say, it’s not an “either or” situation. It’s more like, the harder you try to appear Serious, the more you can look like an idiot. It’s like trying to drive with a mirror directly in front of you. You’re going nowhere fast and you’re going to crash. Just be – without overly worrying about how people see you – and people will see the real you. Or at least a version of the real you. (Are you afraid of the real you? Or people seeing it? That doesn’t really work well.) Really, who has time for all of that pretense???
As a teacher, I also find that people learn best when they’re relaxed. It may offend the Serious, but there’s a reason why I believe in cookies in witchcraft, and why you should evoke the Sky Bunny and Wall Kittens in movement. (Sorry no link, you’re just going to have to come to one of my workshops!). It’s why I delight in getting a room full of occultists to all say “yaaassssss.” And why I hand out ribbons at conventions with “Manifest Birches” printed on them. It gets people to pay attention, to let go of themselves and allow for change and new ideas.
You experience and absorb things much more quickly and effectively when ego is put aside and humor is embraced. It also gives the Universe less of an opportunity to poke at you, and increases your chances of it partying with you. And it allows you to conserve your energy and resources for when you need it the most. It’s not exactly easy either. It takes skill to be able to embrace the dorkness. Life is a pretty crazy place, you might as well try and enjoy it.
Some helpful hints:
– Embrace laughter in your rites.
– It’s OK when things don’t go exactly as planned. Sometimes it’s better that way.
– Having fun can still be serious business, in the best way.
– You’re more flexible and think more clearly when you’re relaxed/at ease.
– The gods definitely have a sense of humor, and as we know some of them enjoy a good prank.
– Worry less about what people might think of you, and more about if you are being who you should be.
– If you can laugh at your mistakes, you can learn from them more easily.
(And if you read all the way down to this point, but disagree with me, the joke could be on you.)
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