Smacking away the hand meant to soothe

I wasn’t going to post regarding this article, but I find I really must, if only in the hopes that its author, Maria Eftimiades, will see my post and understand that her own prejudicial assumption puts out hurtful misinformation about a group of people doing good work.

Discussing her choice to abort her son upon learning that he had Down’s Syndrome, Eftimiades wrote: I’m sure pro-lifers don’t give you the right to grieve for the baby you chose not to bring into the world (another euphemism, although avoiding the word “abortion” doesn’t take any sting out of the decision to have one).

Apparently Eftimiades does not realize that it is with the pro-life community that one finds most, if not all, post-abortion grief therapy programs, which is not surprising when you consider that it is precisely the pro-lifers who understand that she is grieving a LIFE.

After Abortion links to tons of such organizations.

Just as she is “sure” that “pro-lifers don’t give you the right to grieve for your baby,” I am quite sure that Eftimiades would not care to be judged on her decision, and yet she is judging (in real ignorance) a whole group of people who are committed not to judging her, but to helping her through her pain and grief. She effectively smacks away the hand meant to help, because she cannot get past her own prejudice and judgementalism. The chances are very good that she does not know many pro-life folk, and all she has to go on is the media caricature that puts us somewhere between Randall Terry and Carrie’s Mother. But she is a grown-up, mature woman; she could learn more about pro-lifers, if she wanted to.

Eftimiades is a journalist. Perhaps her experience will someday make her curious enough to check out the reality of what pro-lifers “allow” women who have had abortions.

For the record, here are some very fine organizations, doing terrific work with women grieving their lost children.

Rachel’s Vineyard
Hope After Abortion
The Bridge
Ideas for Healing
Hope Alive
Abortion Recovery International Network

“Rachel mourns her children; she refuses to be consoled because her children are no more. Thus says the Lord: Cease your cries of mourning. Wipe the tears from your eyes. The sorrow you have shown shall have its reward. There is hope for your future.”
-Jeremiah 31:15-17

UPDATE: An excellent letter to NRO on this story.

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About Elizabeth Scalia