Can you guess what this is…

… I’ll give you a hint. It makes Baby Jesus cry.

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  • Austria, it figures. Was all sense of artistic and religious taste surgically removed from that country?

    • JP Cherry

      That’s what happens when you run your king off. Without a proper sovereign, everyone eventually falls into chaos. Oh what the poor Habsburgs both living and dead must think of what became of that country. What a glorious dynasty to have fallen at the hands of modernists. …and I’m not even Austrian.

    • Ink

      Austria, really?  Darn.  Were it Germany that would’ve explained the beer.

  • It looks kind of like a poker table. Was there a fixtures sale at the local casino? Or maybe its a prototype for a Mega-Big Gulp cup holder for an RV.

    • Mary Rose

      I posted my response before I saw yours. Poker table in the lead!!

  • Kimberly_whelan

    Why?????  :'(

  • Mary Rose

    Starbuck’s new group table? The Sands new poker table? Pampered Chef’s new picnic table? (Complete with bug repellant candles!) An artist’s draft rendition of the new fireplug for downtown Chicago?

    Whatever it is, it really doesn’t belong in a sanctuary. But now the monstrosity has been blessed… Oy.

  • Lord have mercy…with that glorious tabernacle behind it?!!  It does look just like the drink holder over the engine compartment of our groovy early 80s Winnebago. And what’s with the folding giant clacker ambo?  If you look through the whole photo album, near the end is a shot from the back of the church…the contrast between the gorgeous old decor & the new “additions” is so jarring it’s incomprehensible.

    On a side note, looks like all the servers are girls :o/(though I would like to take my daughters to whoever did their hair…the brown ones anyway, blondie was looking a bit rumpled).

  • I will try not to cuss, but I’m not promising anything.



  • Kathy

    OK – we r all in agreement – there seems to be a lack of “Liturgical Reverence” when they’ve blessed a poker table with cup holders as part of their Mass.  And I have to ask, did they present the Bishop with a beer at the end?  What was in that bottle?

  • southerncatholicgirl

    Ugh, that may be the worst thing I’ve ever seen, especially in such a lovely church! And what was with the fire on top of the altar instead of real candles? The ambo was terrifying as well. How DO you find this stuff?

  • Mrs. Carleigh

    Okay, so we’re NOT cussing, right?  *darn*  When my Sociology of Religion teacher translated Eucharist as “Happy Meal” I had NO idea anyone would take that as a cue for architectural additions to a Church.  What a crying shame.

    •  My thoughts exactly! Things looked pilfered outta local Mickey D’s.

  • One reason why we don’t need to have any respect for modern church art is because modern church art has no respect for us

    •  That was NOT art.  Not by any stretch of the imagination.  🙂

  • Katie O’Keefe

    I said to my daughter, “Isn’t that the saddest thing you’ve ever seen.” Her response: “Sadly…no.”

  •  So I was really cringing until I saw the last few pictures. Oh, they just needed a place to bless the beer!

  • Johnkenny29

    i never knew they sold large bottles of guinness stout in austria…and imagine my shock to see that lego makes altars!!

  • kenneth

    Not quite sure what it is since the link goes to some pages in German that don’t like to load properly. I gather it’s a garish plastic piece of furniture in a church. On the plus side, at least they haven’t added any pink flamingos or truck mud flaps with the chrome naked lady silhouette! Then again, the day ain’t over yet!

  • Karen Bencke

    Ok, I don’t mind a lot of the more modern stuff and even I think that is the ugliest thing! I agree that it totally looks like a poker table and is horribly out of place in that church.  If you are going to add modern bits to an old church like that, they have to be REALLY well thought out and executed, something this certainly is NOT!

  • Ink

    I’m fighting the urge to blow off my final project (due on Saturday) and re-design the altar.  Why are they using a cheap plastic table and ambo in that kind of a beautiful old church??

  • DLe

    It pains me greatly to see that the high altar is just feet away. It’s right behind you! Just turn around… you know, *ad orientem*. It’ll save you money if you use it too, too, because when that plastic block goes out of styl–oh wait, it already is.

  • Marcus

    It’s just a table. Big deal.

  • Ron

    It looks kind of like the spool tables that were popular in the 70’s. It’s even painted the same color some of them were.  Oy vey!!

  • Angela Pea

    Okay.  In the interest of charity and kindness, let’s imagine some sort of goodness in this scenario.  Perhaps it isn’t actually plastic, but lacquered wood.  It matches the zigzag ambo.  Maybe it was thoughtfully designed and built by a local artist who is a faithful practicing Catholic (with odd ideas about interior design) and who donated it to the church out of the goodness of his heart.  Seriously, I like the red, for both it’s liturgical significance and the way it blends with the veining in the marble behind and the pattern on the carpet.  It’s the modern starkness in contrast to the surroundings that makes me flinch a bit.

  • Oh boy.  It looks like a table at a cheap restaurant.

  • Mary Emily Scallon

    For the first few photos, I couldn’t figure out what was going on. Then I realized – that red plastic thing is their new altar. They are blessing it. They also taking photos during Mass. And the group at the end, posing proudly with the new “altar,” are all 50+. So is this it for the Church in Austria? Is Austria one of those countries where no one has babies anymore?

  • drea916

    I agree with what most everyone else has said. In addition…if we put aside our opinions. If you were to think of this as a non-Catholic or non-religious person…why do we accept lameness that would not be accepted in other parts of our lives? For example, people show up to Mass dressed all messy. (I understand that random person who just came back from camping and didn’t have time to change. 1/2 of my parish did not just come from camping or work- they just don’t care.) If those people were to show up to work dressed that messy, they wouldn’t be respected.

    Another example is (most) parish choirs. Uneducated in music, heavy use of guitars and tamborines, poor skill in singing. Why do we tolerate it? If I don’t do my job, lawyers won’t use me. Why do we tolerate the lameness in our Church??? So, the same thing with this table…people wouldn’t put this ugle thing in their home. Why in the world would it go in a HOLY play?! (I hope my rant makes sense.)

  • Bill M.

    I think I saw one of those tables discounted at the local Mall-Wart.