Donald Trump eats his taco salad like every other red-blooded American: on top of his ex-wife

Happy #CincoDeMayo! The best taco bowls are made in Trump Tower Grill. I love Hispanics! https://t.co/ufoTeQd8yA pic.twitter.com/k01Mc6CuDI

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) May 5, 2016

Last week, America celebrated “Cinco de Mayo” which is Hispanic for “have a taco salad on top of your ex-wife.” I know that sounds weird, but in the world of Donald Trump, anything is possible.

Trump tweeted a picture of himself eating not just a taco bowl, but “the best taco bowl,” to wish everyone a happy May 5th. In case you were wondering, the best taco bowls in the world come for Trump Tower Grill, where else?

You’re probably saying, “So what? It’s a man more orange than John Boehner eating a crappy looking fried thing!” But look closer… closer… no, closer. Here, the Internet did it for you:

No, that’s not Ellen DeGeneres! That’s Marla Maples. Trump’s ex-wife, or at least one of them. She is filed as “Wife 1993-1999.” That photo is in a recent People magazine that he had apparently been reading.

I think it’s more concerning that he was also reading The New York Times. If that’s where he’s getting his news, we are going to be even worse off if he’s president. And it was higher in the priority chain on his desk, above Marla’s photo.

On another note: Wow! The Internet really has a lot of time on its hands. I see Trump eating lunch in a photo and I’m moving on. But boy did people study this thing. Did they think they were going to find Waldo? Or Matt Lauer? And now I’ve looked at so long I’m starting to get hungry. Somebody pass the corn chips and Mountain Dew. And call my high school sweetheart, I want to know what she’s been up to.