Report: Vatican Creates Orders For Perpetually Outraged Catholics

Report: Vatican Creates Orders For Perpetually Outraged Catholics July 7, 2015

(AoftheANews) VATICAN CITY – The Congregation for Institutes of Consecrated Life and Societies of Apostolic Life announced today the formation of three new apostolic orders geared towards perpetually outraged Catholics – one for men, one for women, and the third for those who are outraged that the CICLSAL has formed new apostolic orders.


The spokesman for the  Congregation told AoftheA News that these orders were formed to give Catholics determined to be angry about anything and everything, a “safe place” to develop their “unique form of spirituality”; to be part of a community where “their points of view were taken seriously”. Surveys revealed that the number of P.O. Catholics was on the rise – primarily on the Internet.

“The Holy Father has asked the Church to reach out and welcome those living on the margins, those out on the fringes,” the spokesman said. “And frankly, we couldn’t think of anything more fringey than the perpetually outraged Catholic. Naturally, they all complained about this directive.”

The Congregation provided no additional details about governance, rules, or privileges, though an anonymous source told AoftheA News that the names for the three orders are the Kvetchicans, the Criticizitines, and the Ohellnoians.

It is believed these orders will be moanastic in nature.

Photo credit: ** RCB ** / Foter / CC BY

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