Between Two Worlds: Reminiscing and Moving Forward

Between Two Worlds: Reminiscing and Moving Forward January 4, 2023

For several weeks now I’ve been reminiscing over events that happened to me in 2022. Maybe a better word would be “obsessing” over those events and my journey in 2022.

One of the first was vivid recollections of my friend Mika Ellen Orzech. Mika suddenly crossed over on January 25 of last year. I was shocked when her long-time partner of 11 years, Mandy, posted her death on social media.

It took me months before I could memorialize Mika’s death. Public domain photo by Manfred Richter via Pixabay.

I knew who Mandy was, but had never interacted with her until January 26. This is part of that post.

“I am saddened to announce that Mika Ellen Orzech passed away last night after 9:30pm. Mika was the love of my life, my everything and my soulmate.  She helped me deal with this evil and cruel world.”

It took me months before I could memorialize Mika’s death with this blog article I wrote about her.

Another event that occurred was last summer when a relationship soured. I was looking forward to sharing the rest of my life with a friend who I had first met before the pandemic.

We had stayed in touch before, and after we both moved to separate parts of the country. Me in far western New York State, her in northern Minnesota. I wrote about the entire event here.

It was shortly after that event that I finished working on the matriarchal ancestry project I was doing for my family. It had taken a large portion of my time, but was very rewarding.

Turning over a huge collection of old photos from all us siblings and other memorabilia to my only niece made me happy, but left me at odds with myself.

Okay, what next? I didn’t like where I was living in late July, and wasn’t going to be moving to Minnesota. Except for my sister, I didn’t have any pagan friends in New York. And I really missed my chosen community.

I really missed my chosen community. Public domain image by Anja via Pixabay.

Fortunately in early May I had done a lot of release work with my Goddess Hekate. My sister had decided to get her own apartment and I did the same. It was to give me some of the answers. Again, Hekate guided me with Her answers to my questions.

In August, after applying to many senior apartments in southern Wisconsin, I received an email from where I am living now. It was at the bottom of the list where “I” wanted to move to. No, Hekate intervened and directed me to where She knew I should be.

Everything fell into place, and I moved back to my chosen state in mid-September. Since I no longer had a vehicle, and I walk and hike a lot, it was very close to everything I needed. Within no longer than a ten- to fifteen-minute walk. Hekate wanted me to get more exercise and got me close to those places.

I got into a better routine, and was taking better care of myself physically. I made a few new friends where I live, including walking with a woman who also walks a lot, but has the start of dementia.

It has been a blessing for both of us that we met. Again, Hekate knew way more than me what I was supposed to do by helping someone else. It’s not just about me.

Then came October, when I normally help Circle Sanctuary get ready for their annual Transgender Day of Remembrance Ritual. And my annual blog about TDoR. With Mika having crossed over, I really didn’t want to do it anymore.

It brought back too many bad memories and recollections from years past doing it. Again, I gave it up to Hekate. What should I do? During a meditation, She gave me a nudge. Do it for Mika. You can read about TDoR 2022 here.

Since then I haven’t had any desire to blog. What should I write about? Was it writer’s block, or recollecting and reminiscing about the events of 2022? I had the same issue several years ago. Back then a mentor and friend reminded me of this. “We have always written our stories.”

We have always written our stories. Public domain image by Samuel F. Johanns via Pixabay.

As I write this, I am reminded of a Tarot card I drew on New Year’s Eve. The Five of Earth. “Am I patient with myself? Don’t give up. Keep moving forward.” Yesterday I drew the Burial Mound from my Liminal Spirits Oracle deck. “Death is a transition not an ending. Make peace with your memories.”

My journey with Hekate has indeed been an incredible one. I am so blessed to be Her chosen, and one of Her Priestesses. Hekate IS my Guardian, Guide and Gatekeeper. Hail Hekate!

Until next time…sometime and somewhere in the future…

About Brianne Raven Wolf
Brianne Ravenwolf has identified as Pagan from a very young age. She is an active member of Circle Sanctuary in Wisconsin. She follows a Hekatean Witchcraft Spiritual path. To relax, she likes to walk, camp and hike as much as possible in very rural areas. You can read more about the author here.
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