St. Paul, MN – Another day and yet another scandal has rocked the Harris/Walz campaign. After reports that Tim Walz played with two dogs at a dog park, ordered food like an actual human being, and used fertility treatments to start his beautiful family with his long-time wife Gwen, our sources claim that the Walz family garden is significantly less productive this year.
“Yeah, generally his sunflowers are towering over the hedge there,” states neighbor D.J. Davenport, “but this year, there are only a couple of flowers that stand out.”
To be fair to Walz, Minnesota experienced a long winter and gardeners suffered many setbacks well into early June, as noted by the Harris/Walz campaign
“No excuses!” says a local gardening activist. “We are Minnesotans and no governor of mine is going to yield less-than-ideal sugar snap peas. An absolute disgrace, this man is. It’s dangerous how corrupt Democrats have gotten.”
We attempted to reach out the Governor Walz, but his team notified us that he was at the state fair eating corndogs with his daughter Hope.
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