This is the second part of a multi-part series on what our spouses need, but may not always articulate. In Part 1 and this Part 2, we are focusing on what most husbands need. Starting next week, we focus on wives.
So, did you have good conversations with your man after reading Part 1? Did you two identify any inner thoughts and feelings that he has experienced but hasn’t quite expressed before?
Not long ago, I was interviewing a marriage counselor for my next research project, and he asked if he could share something first. He told me that he regularly shares the nationally representative research from our books, including For Women Only and For Men Only, with hurting couples. He has seen many well-intentioned couples get into a deep rut because they are either hurting each other without intending to or simply not speaking the other person’s language. Over and over, he has seen that once they understand the inner, often unspoken emotions underneath the surface, they know how to love their spouse well and rebuild the relationship. They truly understand what has been hurting the other person – and know how to build their partner up instead.
In the spirit of that type of understanding, let’s build on Emotional Needs 1, 2 and 3 and tackle the next three inner needs that men may feel deeply, but don’t always know how to say. Remember: each of these articles is purposefully not two-sided: we are focusing solely on men in Part 1 and 2, and then focusing solely on women in our next two articles. (Please read Part 1, including the caveats, before reading Part 2.)
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