This is an amusing video clip of Glenn Beck, full of bravado and declaring himself to be a prophet because he’s been predicting that bad things would happen. Which is a lot like the Bible being correct because it claims that there would be wars and rumors of wars in the last days. Wow, that’s stepping out on a limb.
During Glenn Beck’s three day wingnutapalooza in Salt Lake City over the 4th of July, the one that included his bizarre “man in the moon” show, he also took groups of contributors on a tour of a makeshift museum he and David Barton put together. And he told them that all of human history can be explained as Satan trying to destroy God’s chosen people because that will mean God won’t be God anymore. Because that totally makes sense.
When he had his show on CNN Headline News, Glenn Beck’s frequent fill-in when he was gone was Joe Pagliarulo, or Joe Pags. Now Joe is guest hosting for Beck again on his own network. I have a bit of history with Joe Pags. I used to talk to his mother online quite a bit (for Gretchen and Sastra, who would know who I’m talking about, his mother is bnyfoofoo) and she’s a very sweet lady. And he used to have a TV show in Lansing, Michigan. In fact, I was scheduled to be on his show to talk about church/state issues the evening of 9/11, but plans obviously changed quickly and I never did go on. Shortly after that, he left Lansing for, IIRC, San Antonio. And I never got the impression that he was really a wingnut, but this video of him guest hosting for Beck certainly suggests otherwise.
You knew it was inevitable that someone would program a Glenn Beck conspiracy generator, right? If it works for Deepak Chopra, and it does, it certainly works for Beck. Most wingnut rhetoric sounds like a word salad or a game of Madlibs anyway, so it makes perfect sense. And this is obviously true:
Militant academic elitists are consorting with the Bolsheviks at the Federal Reserve to do exactly what Hitler wrote about in the Communist Manifesto. They’re all connected — liberals, Nazis, Kevin Bacon, everybody.
Who could argue with that?
In this delightfully absurd and self-aggrandizing clip from his show, Glenn Beck poses as both martyr and savior. He says he’s trying to fundamentally change the media and he’s “hemorrhaging money” because he believes in something so important. That’s nonsense, by the way. His net worth has skyrocketed. But he’s doing this all just for you. How moving.
This is an amusing rant from Glenn Beck on his show last week. He says that every 20-40 years there’s a “movement of darkness” and that “people of light” have to push it back. And it has something to do with hippies and communists, Martin Luther King and Janis Joplin. So we need to go to the moon. Or something. See if you can make any sense out of this.
Apparently not content merely to be a batshit crazy religious righter, Glenn Beck is now moving into Sylvia Browne territory. He claimed on his Tuesday show, while discussing the case of the three women rescued in Cleveland, that he just has a “bizarre gift” of being able to “look people in the eye and I can feel them and I don’t know anything about them, I don’t know what they’re going through but I can feel pain sometimes.” Move over, John Edwards.
Glenn Beck says that the multiple investigations into alleged campaign finance violations by Michele Bachmann are being undertaken by Muslim Brotherhood members who have infiltrated the government. Hey Glenn, meet Peter Waldron, the Christian evangelical preacher and former Bachmann consultant who is really responsible for those allegations.
We’re used to seeing over the top displays of hyper-emotional melodrama from Glenn Beck, but this display takes it to a whole new level. He ends up on his knees trying to revive a bleeding American flag. Seriously. This is funny shit. Performance art for morons.
As I’ve mentioned before, Glenn Beck is on a crusade to change the 4th of July celebration and he’s producing a live show from Salt Lake City this year to “tell the American story from a point of view you’ve never heard before” — the man on the moon.
As part of his new wingnut paradise in Texas, Glenn Beck says he wants to change the way we celebrate the 4th of July, starting this year. No more fireworks, hot dogs, beer or Bruce Springsteen. Because he hates America, unlike Glenn Beck, who loves America and is a Brave Purveyor of Truth.
Glenn Beck fondly reminisces about the good old days when he was so popular that he was up there with Nelson Mandela and the pope in polls. And now he’s despised and people think he spreads crazy conspiracies. And it’s all because of the “smear machine.”
Dispatches From the Culture Wars
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