This letter is hard to write because I am married to you in so many ways, as are so many of us racial minorities here in America. You are our neighbors, coworkers, and friends (what a blessing!). You are our beloved country (for many, land of our birth and for others, land of our choice). You are our loving church (the body of Christian believers). For some of us, you are our sweet spouses (wonderful soulmates most of the time). And finally, you are our children (if a drop of... Read more
(and white bleeding heart allies), Just earlier this year, my white friend Jenny told me, “Kim, when I see you, I do not see color.” She made the comment right after I revealed to her that I was not sure if my blog should be just for Asian Americans or for Americans in general. I knew what Jenny meant. She can relate to me. I’m not too ethnic, too foreign, too different, or too strange. Because we’re friends, I did not take her... Read more
Earlier this week, my girlfriends and I went to see the movie Bad Moms. All in all, we had a great time watching a movie about other moms, chatting and laughing about it afterwards. We had clean fun–no one cussed, got wasted, lusted for or had sex with someone other than our husbands, or broke any laws. Gasp! We must be prude, repressed Stepford wives in Hollywood’s eyes! But the movie meant well. Despite all the worldly wrappings it was... Read more
Don’t do it. Don’t ever write a book on parenting when you are in the thick of it yourself. I repeat, do not do it! Unless, of course, you feel like this heavy weight on your shoulders that must be cast off and the only way to do that is through words on paper. Only then will you get some relief from this burden. Well, that’s my excuse. There are several reasons why you should not write about parenting when your... Read more
I don’t remember if my parents ever bought it for us, but as kids my siblings and I enjoyed the sweet, red drink mix called Kool-Aid. The mix usually came in a small paper package with a picture of a smiling, red pitcher. It looked and tasted so good. It was a cheap, quick fix for any thirsty child. We kids must have guzzled this refreshing beverage at school and at community functions with peers. My immigrant parents did not... Read more
Yes, you read that right. A kidless weekend is a wonderful much deserved treat for any parent. Now, don’t get me wrong. I love kids, especially my three wonderful sons. I find other people’s kids to be adorable, too, especially my friends’. But being a parent is a great load of responsibility. And we all get burned out from time to time. We get to a point in which we lose our patience, self control, sanity, and even our dignity.... Read more
This past week has taught us that life is full of broken relationships. While there is plenty of beauty and hope, the news media often magnifies the darker side—violence and hatred. Dark feelings are beneath these insidious acts, whether it was the tragic killing of another human being in the midst of law enforcement, or the unnecessary murders of five officers of the peace, or even radical Islamic terrorism against the eighty civilians in Nice, France (and other parts of the... Read more
Black lives matter. Period. Yes, we hear you. We’ve heard of your struggles, past and present. We know that in America you have a history of being treated less so you often stand in solidarity with each other, even crossing different religions, socioeconomic class, and cultural/political affiliations. This may explain why, among all ethnicities in this diverse country, you often utilize the phrase, “my people” and “your people” based on skin color. But deep down inside, you also know that... Read more
Families all across America celebrate the nation’s Independence Day with food, fireworks, and patriotic music. This year, I will celebrate by sharing what America means to me. America is too great for small dreams, according to the late President Ronald Reagan. As I reflect upon this statement, I realize that this is my own sentiment as well. There are a ton of words that I can write to explain the greatness of this nation, including her unique founding roots and history... Read more
of single moms, married moms, dads of all kinds–foster, adopted, step, biological and honorary to raise our children. Add to that list important figures like aunts, uncles, grandparents, godparents, and mentors (single or married). And if I were to include all the other adults who have cared for and loved on my kids throughout the years, then I would have to acknowledge their wonderful teachers, sports coaches, den and troop leaders, Sunday school volunteers, neighbors, and their friends’ parents. Wow,... Read more
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