GETTING IN TOUCH WITH MY FEMININE SIDE: Recently I mentioned two recipes that require virtually no clean-up. A reader asked me what they were. Mmm mmm good. As with all recipes, variations are encouraged and quantities are approximate.

Sandwich (this is a variant of a recipe I got from 365 Days Vegetarian–in general, a good cookbook–and I think it had some silly name like “San Francisco Sandwich,” but since it’s the only kind of sandwich I ever make, I feel no need to give it a foofy name):

You need: Tinfoil; a club roll or portuguese roll or similar; canned corn; plum tomato; white mushrooms; onion; canned artichoke hearts; munster cheese; cayenne pepper. That’s for one sandwich; it should be fairly easy to figure out how to make more.

Preheat oven to 375. Get yourself two big sheets of tinfoil. Slice the roll in half the short way, then slice the halves in half. (Sorry if I’m explaining this badly. You should end up with two bottom-halves and two top-halves. It should look like a much shorter version of a halved sub sandwich.*) Set each bottom-half on a sheet of tinfoil. Cover the bottom-halves with a layer of canned corn (skip this if it sounds too weird, but it’s really good). Slice plum tomato and layer that on top of the corn. Then add a layer of sliced mushrooms; then a layer of onion; then a layer of artichoke hearts. Top each half with a slice of munster cheese; sprinkle cayenne on the cheese; cover with the two top-halves. Wrap the half-sandwiches in the tinfoil and bake for about 15-17 minutes or until onions are as soft as you want ’em. Unwrap and enjoy. Keep napkins handy–these are very messy–but there are no pots or pans to clean. When you’re done, just throw away the foil and give the plate a quick scrub.

Pasta with Roasted Vegetables and Whatnot

You need: Tinfoil, garlic, plum tomatoes, mushrooms (white or crimini), pasta, dried herbs/spices, and butter. You may also want an onion, artichoke hearts, and/or a package of shredded cheese.

Preheat oven to 375. Put water on to boil. Cover a pan in tinfoil. Thinly slice garlic. Set mushrooms on tinfoil. Slice tomatoes (big chunks work best) and set them also on tinfoil. Place the garlic slices on the mushrooms and tomatoes. Cover mushrooms and tomatoes with spices–I use oregano, basil, cayenne, and black pepper, but thyme works too.

When the water is about to boil, stick the pan in the oven. Cook the pasta while the vegetables roast. If you want artichoke hearts or very crisp, tangy onions (mmm), slice them up and put them on the plate you’ll be using.

When the pasta is done, drain it and take the pan out of the oven. Butter the pasta. Scrape the vegetables into it. (You can slice the mushrooms if you want, but they’ll squirt juice at you, and I rarely bother.) If you want cheese, put it on the pasta and vegetables. I prefer Sargento shredded Mexican-blend cheese–unusual with pasta, but good. The heat of the pasta and vegetables, plus the melting cheese, cooks the onions a little bit, but be forewarned–they don’t cook fully.

Clean-up: Throw away the tinfoil. Rinse the pasta pot. Scrub the plate. Especially if you don’t add cheese, this is extremely easy.

* The Rat once found a list of difficult job-interview questions that included, “Explain to me how to tie my shoes. Use only words, no gestures, and don’t get a shoe and practice on it.” This was startlingly tough.

Anyway, there will be real posting later today, but for the moment I thought there might be readers out there who are as obsessed with recipes as I am. In general, the tinfoil trick works wonders–you can cook steaks, for example, with equally limited clean-up.