5) “Fake it til you make it.”

Sadly, I learned this lesson in ministry school. It ties back in with the concept that time heals all wounds, or the country song, “If you’re going through hell, keep on going.” It’s the concept that life is hard, but just keep moving. Don’t let them see you have a bad day.

It’s the idea that if you tell yourself something long enough, eventually you’ll believe it. If someone has wounded you deeply, just tell yourself, “I forgive them” until eventually, you will.

The world is full of fake people. I wore the mask of performance and perfection for many years. But honesty and vulnerability have brought a new kind of strength and healing and energy to my life and I don’t ever want to go back. Maybe you can fake it til you make it, but it’s a rotten way to live.

Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-656-HOPE for the National Sexual Assault Hotline.