Love is an Orientation
This morning I had a regularly scheduled six month follow-up with my dermatologist. No big deal. I just needed some refills for a prescription I’ve been taking for acne. Close to the end of our time I remembered to ask her about a strange red bump that has been on the top of my right big toe for about five months. Here’s the story:
This past Spring I woke up one morning and saw a big red bump on my big right toe. I thought it was a pimple, so I waited about two months for it to go away, but it didn’t. Then I asked my Mom, who throughout my life has been quite efficient and effective at diagnosing pretty much everything, and she thought it was a wart. So I got some of that over the counter wart stuff and used that. After about two more months it still didn’t go away. Then for the last month I had been trying to schedule an appointment, but due to my travel schedule this was the first time I could go in. The big red bump has never hurt nor even been a bother. Just a little annoying to look at when I have bare feet.
Anyway, when the dermatologist looked at it, touched it, microscoped it for an up-close and personal view, she then looked at me with kind of a not so happy look on her face. Then she said:
“Well Andrew, this is a weird bump. It’s definitely not a pimple and it’s definitely not a wart either. It’s has hard as a rock and it has some pretty heavy roots driving into your toe. It being hard and very imbedded in your toe aren’t good things. There’s probably a 10-15% chance it’s cancer. Could be a calcium deposit though. We have to do a biopsy right away.”
So she sent me off and I got a biopsy done on the big red bump that harbors a 10-15% chance it’s cancer. The part that really worried me is she said cancer would explain why I am tired all of the time over the same five month stretch. Ugh.
On the bright side, that means there is an 85-90% chance it’s a calcium build up; and feeling excessively tired is totally due to my nuts travel schedule.
Even though I know the chances are quite slim it actually is cancer, I figure some pre-emptive strike of prayers couldn’t hurt. I don’t exactly know how I feel about this whole situation right now. It’s just really strange. I went in to get a refill on acne medicine and she tells me there is a chance I have cancer. That’s annoying. And now I have three hours to write an article for Religion Dispatches, who contacted me on Wednesday to write a response to some stuff going on in the public forum world. That’s about the last thing I want to do right now. Oh well…
So if you could please pray for my health and my ability to write this article, I would much appreciate it. I will let you all know about the outcome of the biopsy as soon as I find out.
Much love.
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