Conspiracy Theorists Experience Collective Freakout

Conspiracy Theorists Experience Collective Freakout May 17, 2012

…as Obama literary agent revealed to have hyped his African ethnicity to hawk a book 20 years ago.

The Conspiratorial Mind is faced with two alternatives:

1) The State of Hawaii and two local newspapers in Hawaii, as well as a host of agents and actors in between, have created a vast conspiracy to make it appear as though Barack Obama was born in Hawaii in 1961. Microfilms forged. A solid paper trail set in place. Time machines built to make the paper trail look authentic to the Unconspiratorially Minded.


2) A literary agent, working in tandem with a man who has a proven history of strategic lying, lies that Barack Obama was born in Kenya in order to burnish his Global Thinker/Third World Awesomeness Cred for an audience of brie-eating Progressives that cares intensely about such sexy things.

Naturally, the Conspiratorial Mind will go with alternative 1 and the Talk Radio right will be all atwitter from now until the election trying to prove, yet again, that Obama is Not Really an American. This will, in turn, be yet another engraved gift to Obama from the Thing that Used to be Conservatism as it continues to do everything in its power to inadvertantly re-elect him.

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  • I Won

    Lakini Naapa kwamba i alizaliwa nchini Marekani.

    • That’s easy for YOU to say.

  • Ben

    I figure he was born in Hawaii, but I’m finding it a bit harder to call the birthers crazy when his literary agency supposedly listed him as born in Kenya for *16 years*. Also, why did it take his entire first term for this to surface? Does anyone in the media do their job?

    • Gail Finke

      No. No one in the media does his job. Hence the mistakes and even spelling errors in my local newspaper this morning. If they can’t spell, do you expect them to research things?

      • ivan_the_mad

        “If they can’t spell, do you expect them to research things?” SO TRUE.

  • The truth will never be known about this person, you call “president”. Born in Hawai’i? Okay, fine. Does it really freaking matter?
    Breitbart management, for the record, maintains they don’t subscribe to the “birther” thing, but it seems like they believe more like your option #2, as do I.

    • Mark Shea

      Well, yes. It does matter. It means he passes a basic constitutional hurdle for citizenship, which Conspiracy Theorists have maintained he does not pass. I think the Birthers are as nutty as the Truthers (Trig and 9/11).

      Don’t kid yourself that Breitbart released this for any reason other than to gin up Birther hysteria. It’s utterly trivial information–except to conspiracy nuts. It demonstrates that Obama lied in college and knew how to game the system. Big whoop. I’m more concerned about his current lies.

      • “Big whoop. I’m more concerned about his current lies.”

        Hence, my question, “Does it really freaking matter?”

        • Ted Seeber

          I’ve never been a birther. Until the President put out not one, but TWO Hawaiian certificate of live births (short and long form) that showed obvious signs of digital tampering.

          Now I want to know why he kept the birthers going.

          • Mark Shea

            Because crazy idiots make him look good.

            • str

              Exactly! Keeping the birther nonsense alive enables Obamaniacs to point out how crazy doubters of the Godking are. Though that’s not true, it works that way!

            • Rosemarie


              Then again, even if this does revive the birther nonsense, things might be different this time. Up till now, it was easy to perceive birtherism as just “Some crazy Obama-haters over there making unsubstantiated claims about his birthplace.” In comparison, Obama seemed like the innocent victim of their vindictive rhetoric who soundly refuted their charges by releasing his full birth certificate.

              Now, however, it seems as though Obama himself was complicit in an earlier claim that he was born in Kenya, when it suited his purposes. Even if he didn’t write his own bio in that pamphlet (and on the publicist’s website) that he didn’t know about it or try to correct it for sixteen years strains credibility. Like some below said, it’s as though Obama himself was the first birther.

              So maybe people will now look at the birthers and say, “Though I believe Obama was born in Hawaii, I can see why they would think otherwise. After all, Obama himself apparently made that claim at one point.” Maybe the doubter’s won’t seem quite as crazy as they did in the past.

      • Rosemarie


        I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt when the folks at Breitbart say that this is part of them vetting the president the way the MSM should have four years ago, and that they are not promoting Birtherism. They’re right, this is *exactly* the kind of thing the media should have unearthed and asked questions about, since it contradicts his birth certificate (which I believe is valid and accurate) and so raises questions about his veracity (or lack thereof).

  • jill

    And the people pointing this out are doing so to illustrate yet another instance where Obama has created an image that he feels will most benefit him at the time. I don’t care where he was born, but I do care that he seems to have a problem with the truth and it’s all about HIM!

  • Dan C

    I like Brie, am progressive, but I haven’t read the book. I feel as if I am missing out. It’s no wonder I can’t dress fashionably.

  • Elizabeth Scalia

    I’m pretty sure it’s number 2. Marketing.

  • Scott E

    3) A young Harvard law student in need of financial help for the high cost of a Harvard education fills out the application for admission to the school saying that he was born in Kenya (even though it is not true) in order to qualify for financial aid for foreign-born students. The literary agent takes that information from the Harvard student register when writing the bio for the book.

    • Heather

      So Obama lied and said he was a foreign student to get loan money? Wouldn’t this be fraud?

      It is really funny that Obama was so outraged that people tried to say that he was not an American, when it now seems he was claiming to not be an American long before anyone else did it!

      Obama, the original Birther!

      • str

        Beware! Another myth is born. Lest you could prove that to be fact.

    • Mark Shea

      True. Which, again, demonstrates that Obama is a facile liar.

    • Hans Cooke

      100% correct I believe. Classic

    • Rosemarie


      Yeah, either Mark’s #2 or Scott’s #3.

    • Dan C

      I work with many foreign born students. They save up for years, have debt and do not have financial aid packages. What financial aid packages are for foreign-born students? This I would love to know. Is it just university-specific? I see rare, very rare opportunities through NIH and NSF, but for fairly accomplished foreign-born researchers.

    • Dan C

      There was a false rumor years ago about Obama receiving a Fulbright, claiming he was foreign-born. Is this the same thought?

  • Heather

    If Obama’s book agent used this in Obama’s boi, isn’t it hard to claim Obama did not know this? So it seems Obama was at some time willing to allow himself to be represented as being born in Kenya….. To sell books.

    So Obama would be among the first people to falsely claim he was born in Kenya! Doesn’t this make Obama one of the first birthers?

    Now THAT is funny!

    • Rosemarie


      I agree. Priceless.

  • Ben

    Important to remember, this one on’s website until February of 2007, where it was changed to Hawaii. So if it was an oversite it’s one that existed for 16 years.

  • Deacon Nathan Allen

    Of course, it wouldn’t even matter whether he was born in Kenya, because (his mother being a U.S. citizen who had lived in the United States for at least ten years, more than five of which were after her fourteenth borthday) he would be a natural-born U.S. citizen because of his mother. Honestly, 8 USC § 1401 as it existed in 1961 is not that hard to read!

    • Mark Shea

      I see the Authorities have gotten to you with the Official Story.

      Pod Person!

  • Hans Cooke

    This story is making my day. It will take a week or so, but the msm will HAVE to eventually approach it. Then it will be fun to see Carney answering questions about it. LOL!

    • Rosemarie


      At this point I don’t see anyone in the MSM addressing it. isn’t touching it either (yet) but if I were a gambler I’d bet Hannity will have something to say about it tonight.

  • Elizabeth Warren

    Take it from a Cree like me; Kenyan born “minority” status will in no way aid in getting equal treatment by University admissions and hiring personnel.

    • Ted Seeber

      Oh, come on, you know that the “Monroe Doctrine” crowd still thinks Africans are more evolved, and more civilized, than the Cree. Never mind that Native American tribes often were more advanced in some areas than the “old worlders”….

      • Hezekiah Garrett

        …agriculture, politics, and hygiene.

  • CK

    I don’t know which to believe. I think one can remain skeptical as to whether Obama was born in Hawaii without “believing” he was not born in HI or the US. I think it is reasonable to remain agnostic on this issue. However, those who go over the top in professing their steadfast belief that Obama was born in HI, like the Breitbart editors, are merely genuflecting to avoid the wrath of the Leviathan’s scorn.

    • It didn’t help Breitbart himself.

      It really doesn’t matter. The toothpaste is already out of the tube and he will be “re-elected” because he’s running against Bob McCain and people still will choose freebies over real life….if it’s even a legitimate election in the first place. Obviously the Empire has a history of jimmying the numbers to serve the needs of the money-changers.

  • Elizabeth Warren

    … nor in attaining financial aid.

  • A few years ago, in the book, “The God Factor”, President Obama is described as a Muslim who went to Roman Catholic school in Indonesia — and therefore, quite tolerant of religions. Throughout the book, there are profiles/interviews with famous celebs in many professions, sharing their beliefs about God or the lack of a belief in God. At the time, the future-President Obama was a lesser-known entry…and at the time, it was obvious a good thing to promote yourself as a Muslim who was tolerant of all religions.

  • Whoever is impersonating Ms. Warren, please note she doesn’t claim Cree decent, but rather Cherokee.

    • And a rather suspect amount of Cherokee blood at that….

      • Hezekiah Garrett

        That’s an interesting topic in and of itself. I haven’t seen enough evidence yet to convince me that her ancestor, the Colonel, didn’t hide his wife’s background at the time by lying.

        But I think EVERYONE in that conversation missed something very important. Even if we assume her family history was correct, and I would believe her family history before I believe some of the research, it doesn’t matter. She’d be descended from an Indian woman, but that does not make her an Indian.

        The only appropriate answer to anyone’s claim of being “part Indian”?

        “Which part?”

        • Ted Seeber

          In my case, the part that makes me still speak Chinook Wawa while playing at the Spirit Mountain Casino. Despite the fact that the native american part of my ancestors were Cherokee and Klickitat and probably only spoke Chinook Wawa the one time a year during the great Celilo Falls spring salmon Potlatch.

          Certainly by the time my grandmother was young, they were only 1/16th native and off the reservation- though still buried in the same cemetery (I go and visit it once a year, though all the graves I know about for my ancestors are in the white section, not the fenced in native cemetery with the sign that says “beware of Martha Cloud’s grave, somebody left a bear trap for her grave goods”).

  • bob

    People are missing the REAL story: the booklet also has a picture of the everlasting candidate Ralph Nader. Now where was HE born?????????????????
    Can HE ever run again??????????

    • Ted Seeber

      I would like to see this be more reasonable- *all candidates* should have to provide 56 certified copies of their birth certificate for each of the states plus the occupied territories that vote.

  • Noah D

    I find it mind-boggling that people are still going on about the whole birther business – it’s such an obvious foil.

    All you need to know about Obama is that the man had his political ‘coming-out’ party at Bill Ayers’ house.

    Bill Ayers. Self-admitted terrorist and Communist.

    And we’re going on about Obama’s birth cert? Between Ayers, Wright and Chicago, this guy should have been laughed off the stage. But nope, let the media sweep the rest of that under the rug, and we’ll focus on the birth cert! It’s almost as if the media is trying to get collective revenge for being called on their previous clumsy attempt to throw an election through fraud and lies.

  • Some areas? You mean agriculture, politics, and hygiene, right?

    • Ted Seeber

      More permaculture, politics, and hygine, but I’d also include diplomacy and honesty.

  • Rod Dreher

    Stop insulting Brie! Monster!

    • Mark Shea

      It’s time to do an intervention.

  • Rich Fader

    I do have to admit I wonder if there are some Indonesian papers that he did interviews with and told them “Oh, yeah, dude, Jakarta born and raised.” This guy is like Bill Clinton in that he’ll say whatever he thinks will make him look good. Except Bubba was, in comparison, a modest man. Which, considering what a sprawling ego Bubba possesses, is impressive.