I don’t want to sound like a broken record but my wife and I are having some marital problems. Mostly me I guess. I have been questioning wether or not we should stay married. We have been married for about 2 and a half years now and have a pretty good marriage other than the fact that I think I may have married the wrong person. We dated for about 7 months before we got married in the temple. While... Read more

I’m an LDS graduate student currently in training to get my PhD in clinical psych. Although I don’t plan to work exclusively with LDS populations, I expect that wherever I settle down, I will get members of my local stake coming to me because we share the same religious beliefs. My question is, in your experience how do you manage the multiple relationships that arise from such a situation? LDS communities are often times somewhat insulated and the lay model... Read more

What is an appropriate response when your spouse absolutely refuses any form of intimacy?After our last child was conceived — 9 years ago 00 my wife announced she wouldn’t have any physical relationship with me anymore. And, she has enforced it: no sex, no kissing and virtually no touching.She said she didn’t like it and I was selfish if I didn’t let her stop.I’ve tried to talk to her over and over. She refuses to even discuss it (she claims... Read more

I have what I consider to be a socially acceptable eating disorder addiction; I compulsively overeat and I am addicted to sugary foods (ie. cookies, brownies, cakes, candy, chocolate, etc.) I have sought help through my local Overeater’s Anonymous group and am working through their 12 Step Recovery program. It is not the LDS Addiction Recovery Program, although there is one available also. My life is changing dramatically for the better having made this decision to turn my eating habits... Read more

Visitors who comment or ask questions on this blog understand that they are not entering into a client/therapist relationship with Natasha Helfer Parker, LCMFT. Advice given on this blog is done so relative to how the question/comments are presented. Visitors should remember that Natasha Helfer Parker, LCMFT may not have all relevant information to the specific questions when giving her response. Any questions/comments posted on this blog become the property of The Mormon Therapist and could be used in future... Read more

I have been interviewed by MormonMatters.org. The interview is posted today. Check out their site. I do want to clarify that I am not a “doctor.” I have my masters degree in Marriage and Family Therapy. Read more

Not sure your opinion on this view of shame vs. guilt, but I had heard something that stuck with me. The idea was that guilt is something that can be earned, but shame is inherited from unhealthy attitudes (e.g. sexual repression) that we get from our parents. When we are “shamed” as children for what is natural, this causes psychological damage and can be confused with guilt. But only guilt (actual transgression) is earned. We have to find a way... Read more

I don’t wish to be critical of some of the statements made here, but I do wish to clarify the counsel we have been given regarding discussing our private sex lives with friends or family. The Church’s counsel has always been to not discuss sexual matters outside of marriage unless with a therapist or counselor if absolutely needed. Open sexual discussions where women and men allude to their friends or acquaintances what they have tried, what they do, how it... Read more