Thanks to all of you who have written in with suggestions for how to more efficiently run my blog. I am in the process of beginning to apply some these suggestions and I appreciate all of the input. So far this blog has been an enjoyable and productively challenging project and I owe all of you who write in with questions and comments a thank you for making this possible. Thank you! Read more
But we are not expected to never eat. In fact, our physical body would die. And the hungrier we are, the more natural it is to think of food. It is similar with our sexual selves as well. Whoa, there. If sex is equal to the need for food, then what of those who aren’t married? What of married relationships where that is not possible or where there is sin or abuse or addiction? I just cannot agree with what... Read more
This can also be very tricky (regarding imbalance of sexual desire) in a relationship where there is abuse of any kind or coercion or other unhealthy patterns. Some women aren’t disinterested or distant because they don’t care about sex; it may be because they are in pain and the husband has reduced them to an object and expects sex anyway. Bad stuff. I have seen it too often. There has to be give and take and it’s not always so... Read more
I agree with the commenter that the answer to your question is between you and the Lord. I came across an interesting comment on another LDS site about sexuality that seems to address your very issue: “In my experience and in talking to several church authorities in varying levels, the problem isn’t in the act (of masturbation), it is in the addiction to said act. However the same problem could arise in the addiction of married sexual relations. When I... Read more
I have been married, happily, for almost 5 years (this month!) We have 3 kids and a healthy sex life. But I have been struggling to fully immerse myself and enjoy sex and can honestly say that I have only had 3 orgasms ever. From what I have learned: if you’ve had one, you’ll know. I am curious though, are there different levels of intensity of orgasms? I usually enjoy sex and can get to a point where it feels... Read more
It’s been a few weeks since I posted originally, titled “I discovered my husband has been enrolling in adult friend network sights”. And I am excited to say that my husband appears to be following through with his promises so far. He met with the bishop and the bishop is sending him to the addictions recovery group in our area. This surprised me, I didn’t realize that this sort of behavior could or would be considered an addiction. It also... Read more
I am interested in other responses to your question but thought I would give you my input. I should preface by saying that I am in no way an authority, but I have given much thought to this. In my opinion, only you can answer the questions that you asked. I think we (in general) have the tendency to want things to be “cut and dried,” or black and white. We want things spelled out for us- do this/don’t do... Read more
I need to exercise. I spent many years in a physical, sexual, verbal and emotional abusive marriage. I work several jobs to support my children, including one on a mission. I have no family around. I feel like living this secret past doesn’t allow me to fit in with others. I attend the Temple regularly, do my V.T., teach relief society, help and serve others as much as possible. I feel like I am doing my best to be a... Read more
I am a single LDS female (virgin) and I wanted to do a certain yoga type exercise program, namely 5 Tibetans, on a regular basis for its great health benefits and little time it takes to do. I find myself very aroused when doing some exercises. You are supposed to do 21 repetitions but for example, when lying on the floor and lifting both legs up simultaneously (using pelvic muscles I guess) I have to stop after just 5 or... Read more
Thanks for a great post and great comments. My DW and I had a great conversation the other evening about this very idea, that so many LDS (and other) folks want to know what the “rules” are: where the lines are. If there is a rule, we’re determined to try to follow it, but we need to know what the rule is. (We must seem almost frantic to Natasha and other professionals when we clamor to know whether what we’re... Read more
The Mormon Therapist
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