The Best a Man Can Be?

The Best a Man Can Be? January 16, 2019
Screen cap from the commercial.

We have to talk about this. Dragging my not so narrow behind to the computer for this one. Gillette’s new ad campaign that calls out toxic masculinity. It’s not Quiverfull, but so many times we’ve seen prime examples of toxic masculinity in Quiverfull. So yes, in a way it is Quiverfull.

How many toxic pastors have we watched struggling with what it means to be a man, to be masculine and a lead a family or church? We see their crazy struggles to define maleness, the odd spins that they put on all sorts of gender roles.

Yesterday morning I came across Gillette (manufacturer of razors) newest ad, speaking of what men can be and being the best. I was very touched, thought that they did an outstanding job of defining what toxic masculinity can look like. Showed it to my husband. He nodded and said he thought it was a good one, but I knew he would.

He is very masculine, soldier of the year several times and a former military man. There is nothing unmasculine about him. But I’ve never seen him struggling to define his manhood like many in Quiverfull seem to do.

Take a look at the ad yourself and tell me what you see:

What I find way more shocking than the ad is the furious debate it has engendered among men. Guys I’ve known to be reasonable and rational are losing their minds over this, behaving as if they have been personally attacked as less than. I’ve heard the commercial described as “Anti Man,” “Male Bashing” and a pile of other things that I am just not seeing.

Men, we love you, we women, but we think everyone, male and female could be doing more to make our world a better place. No one is saying that all men are horrible. No one is saying there aren’t men already doing these things. Male privilege needs to be a thing of the past.

Gender roles just need to die and all of us be the best versions we can be.

Why are so many reacting like this is the end of the world, instead of the beginning of enlightenment?


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About Suzanne Titkemeyer
Suzanne Titkemeyer went from a childhood in Louisiana to a life lived in the shadow of Washington D.C. For many years she worked in the field of social work, from national licensure to working hands on in a children's residential treatment center. Suzanne has been involved with helping the plights of women and children' in religious bondage. She is a ordained Stephen's Minister with many years of counseling experience. Now she's retired to be a full time beach bum in Tamarindo, Costa Rica with the monkeys and iguanas. She is also a thalassophile. She also left behind years in a Quiverfull church and loves to chronicle the worst abuses of that particular theology. She has been happily married to her best friend for the last 32 years. You can read more about the author here.

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