Pregnancy thoughts and guesses

I am 36 weeks along, and this pregnancy has been going well. In many ways this pregnancy has been the same as my others, and in many ways it has been different. So I thought I’d take some time to put it all in a post.

I am told every time I go anywhere that I am huge. People are usually shocked that I am not due tomorrow. I am feeling rather large, but then again, I have always been big with every pregnancy. I’m already down to only a few shirts that are long enough to cover my belly, and I usually save them for when we go somewhere. So around the house the bottom of my stomach is usually peeking out of the bottom of my shirt, which my husband finds hilarious. I may have to break down and buy another shirt of 2 to make it through this month. I’m still getting around ok (with lots of waddling and groaning) but I destest picking up toys off the floor, and I keep bowling over toddlers with my belly because I’m forget just how far it actually sticks out!

This baby is very active, (actually reminds me alot of my pregnancy with “Ms Action”) so much so, that at times my midwife has had a hard time figuring out what position the baby was in! It is kind of funny to watch them figure out where the back is, turn to grab the Doppler and by the time they get it on my stomach to hear the baby’s heart beat, baby is long gone. My whole stomach jumps and bumps around, visibly! All you have to do is pat my belly, and the baby will respond by rolling around and poking limbs out against my skin here and there.

I wasn’t sick this time. Well, I was nauseous for the first few months. But usually I am puking every day, for 4 months. So this was weird. I only threw up once, and that is a record low for me. I craved citrus with my other pregnancies, which meant I was eating several oranges and grapefruits a day. This time I still crave the usual sweets here and there, but my new craving has been cheese and meat, I am a decided carnivore this time around. Grocery shopping with a pregnant woman is quite a challenge. Without a detailed list I would end up putting whatever I crave into the cart, and get home with nothing to make an actual meal. I have strong aversions to the meat and potato type dishes, but I want tacos, stir frys, and salads (with lots of chicken cheese and bacon to satisfy my meat cravings of course) so we end up eating the same meals over and over. I think my husband is getting tired of homemade Pizza.

I have been so tired this time! Maybe it’s because I’m chasing 3 kids, maybe because my iron tested low this time around. Either way, I’ve been tired enough to spend time dozing on the couch (while the kids play by themselves) pretty much every day, tired enough that my husband has been making a point of getting up with the kids every morning so I can snatch an extra hour of sleep, and tired enough that I have reached the point of weepy incoherency several times every week. I am being careful about taking my Iron supplement, and trying to pack in as much sleep as I can, and trying not to be frustrated by how limited I feel.

This pregnancy has been emotionally different this time. In the past, I think I kind of saw myself as a pregnancy machine. Be pregnant nine months, have a baby; this is my role as a woman, this is what I do. I loved each baby, and enjoyed aspects of each pregnancy, but I guess I was more “business like” in my approach to the whole thing. This time around, every milestone feels more real, more raw. I am more vulnerable emotionally than before. I’ve been trying to embrace it all, letting myself cry when I need to, and talking about my anxieties. I’m a bit nervous about the birth. Usually I tried to turn off my emotions and focus on my body, I’m not sure I’ll be able to do that as easily now. So I wonder how I will handle the intense experience of labour and childbirth this time around?