I never imagined I would walk through the valley of divorce. My grandfather and grandmother spent the last decades of their lives separated (essentially divorced), my dad and mom divorced, and I swore I’d never end up like that. But I did. Two years later, I am still navigating the wreckage, learning to breathe again, remarried, and slowly finding my footing in a place that no longer feels familiar. (I wrote about the devastation of my divorce here.) Finding hope... Read more
Let’s have a little heart-to-heart, shall we? Some of you have given up on God, church, or both because someone who represented God let you down. Maybe it was a pastor who fell hard. Maybe a church leader said something stupid (it happens more than I’d like to admit). Maybe someone in the pews was judgmental and harsh with you, not at all like Jesus. So, you walked away. You ghosted the Church. You’re out there living your “spiritual but... Read more
A Pastor’s Journey Through Burnout, Failure, and Redemption Failure—real, soul-crushing, “what-have-I-done” failure—is rarely sudden. It’s usually a slow fade, a long road of small compromises, exhaustion, and unmet desires that pile up like a Jenga tower, waiting for that final piece to send it crashing down. I didn’t wake up one day and decide, Hey, today seems like a great day to crash and burn! Today feels like a great day to ruin my life. No one does. Failure—especially the marriage-ending,... Read more
True friendship is a gift we sometimes take for granted. A devoted friend is a priceless gift who continually surprises you with their faithful love and acceptance. True friends aren’t just people who laugh at your jokes; they’re the ones who cry with you when life gets messy and disappointing and you are suffering the consequences of a boatload of bad decisions. A loyal friend is the one who sticks around when life gets ugly. Someone who doesn’t flinch when... Read more
They don’t tell you this when you’re signing divorce papers, but you’re not just parting ways with a spouse—you’re also signing up for the emotional Hunger Games with your adult children. (May the odds be ever in your favor.) When it comes to my adult kids, divorce, and Christmas, it’s now a mix of happy memories and depressing realities. Once upon a time, Christmas was the most wonderful time of the year for me. Now, not so much because half... Read more
The story of Leah and Rachel, known to some as the “original sister wives,” is found in Genesis. These two women became the co-wives of Jacob (later known as Israel), and their story offers a compelling glimpse into the complexities of family dynamics and divine purpose. Leah and Rachel were the daughters of Laban, a cunning and selfish man. Jacob, a man of questionable character himself, cheated his brother Esau by deceiving their father and stealing his brother’s birthright. Escaping... Read more
Have you noticed that the traits or behaviors we see, dislike, and criticize in others often reflect something within ourselves? I first heard the phrase, “You spot it, you got it” from a respected pastor who intended to highlight the importance of self-awareness. Our reactions to others reveal a lot about ourselves. Like it or not, admit it or not, we humans tend to be extremely sensitive in others to what is hidden (or not so hidden) in us. I... Read more
Family. One simple word, and a common word at that, but one “f” word that can stir a boatload of emotions for many. For some, when they think of their mom, dad, siblings, and so on, they have warm fuzzies (a good “f” word). They think of playing Monopoly in front of the fireplace while sipping their favorite beverage and eating popcorn. However, for others, even the whisper of family evokes anything from troubling thoughts to outright terror. Sadly, I... Read more
Infidelity, a nicer word for adultery perhaps, is far more common than most want to admit. The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy reports that when it comes to married couples, between 10 and 15 percent of women and 20 and 25 percent of men are unfaithful. That’s around one in ten and about one out of four. Sadly, the numbers do not represent a much higher percentage who, according to Jesus, commit adultery in their hearts when they look... Read more
Have you ever wondered if you would survive during a time of trying to navigate a self-inflicted tumultuous emotional storm? Maybe you said to yourself, If just one more thing hits the fan, I quit! You might not be suicidal, but you sure as heck are ready to wake up in heaven sooner than later. The tempest is especially difficult to endure when you know in your knower that you caused it. What’s worse, perhaps some of your oldest friends... Read more
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