4 Scriptures That Guide My Home Life

I was asked recently what my favorite scriptures are that guide my home life. Wow! That is deep. Well, the first thing that came to my mind are the 10 commandments. My sarcastic side remembers how often I wanted to kill my family growing up. But clearly, that is laid out in the top 10 instructions from God- ‘thou shalt not kill’. And teenage me was constantly chanting that to myself when dealing with my 3 teenage, stinky brothers.  

Love

Now that I’m a mom my taste in scriptures is a little more refined. 4 Nephi 1: 15 is one of my favorites. It reads:

15 And it came to pass that there was no contention in the land, because of the love of God which did dwell in the hearts of the people. 

They loved God so much that they didn’t have conflict. Wow! Can you imagine a world like that? Instead of being divided in every issue, we could let God guide us. I can imagine the level of conflict would drop dramatically.

Loving God is the key to a happy family and a happy life. So I try to focus on love when I am doing chores. I hate chores, but I do laundry because I love my family and want them to have  clean clothes. And dishes aren’t as gross when I see it as an act of love, and to keep everyone healthy.

Even cleaning the house becomes joyful when I do it because I love my home and family. And when I am upset I try to see my family more as God sees them. We all know contention is of the devil, so I try to avoid it. Even conflict is different when you approach it from a place of love. 

I also love this scripture about Charity. It is found in Moroni 7 45-47 and reads:

45 And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

46 Wherefore, my beloved brethren, if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all, for all things must fail—

47 But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him.

Charity

Even though these verses discuss charity, the pure love of Christ is the ideal guide for all our family interactions. Being long suffering, (or patient) is the first and most important goal of all good parents.

Kids are crazy and do a lot of things that make you roll your eyes as they learn and grow. But patience takes what could be frustrating or irritating and makes it funny and a good memory instead.

I mean, seriously kids are hilarious! And it is a privilege to get to guide them in this crazy world.

Honesty

Moroni 7 is a great guide as we aspire to be to have the happiest families. Honestly is very important. As a mother, I am willing to forgive my child nearly every mistake as long as he is honest with me and we can discuss it. And I always try to be honest with my spouse.

Dishonesty takes many forms. I have had friends who hid expenses from their partners. And infidelity is the ultimate form of deceit. If we focus on having charity in our families and in our homes, the Lord’s spirit is there. The Spirit is the ultimate guide, support, and comfort. And I need that support as a wife and mother. 

Kindness and humility

Getting back to that scripture, Moroni mentions kindness, humility, and a clean mind.  Kindness and humility bring us closer to God. And a clean mind invites the Lord’s spirit to dwell with us. I need that closeness when I am feeling overwhelmed. 

And I can’t tell you how many times my teenager has pointed out my mistakes or how uncool I am. But that’s OK. I’ve learned to laugh at myself. If I keep my focus on the Lord and the true purpose of life, things like that slide off like water on a duck’s back. And if we keep our focus on the Lord, and rejoice in the gifts He has given us, endurance becomes easier. And the rest of these things flow naturally. When I am focused on God and making Him happy in my family interactions, I’m kinder and a better person.

Learning

My final scripture may surprise you. But I love 3 Nephi 17:3.

3 Therefore, go ye unto your homes, and ponder upon the things which I have said, and ask of the Father, in my name, that ye may understand, and prepare your minds for the morrow, and I come unto you again.

This verse is from King Benjamin’s council to the Nephites. They were having a multi-day gathering where he was teaching them a lot. And he wanted them to be ready to learn more.

This may not seem like a typical scripture for the family. But I love the instruction to go to your home and ponder on the things of God. Asking God for answers is tapping into the eternal source of all knowledge. I do it every day because I am lost most of the time, and need Him to guide me. Parenting an autistic teenage boy is so contrary to all my experiences as a girly girl. I am always asking God for help. My brain isn’t wired like my son’s is. And to be a good parent I need to understand his perspective. Only God really knows how to help me with that.

Prayer

I try to always pray before handling difficult situations. Because my greatest regrets come from knee-jerk reactions. I will never forget when my son was 2 or 3 and I told him a dozen or more times not to run into the street.

Of course, he ran into the street, nearly being hit by a car. I freaked out and spanked him and yelled at him. A lot! I had been SO scared!

And then with tears running down his fac,e he asked me “Mom, what is a street?” And I realized my mistake.  I had never given him the key to understand my instructions. I’d missed the whole point.

After I showed him the street he never ran into it again. But I could have saved us both a lot of stress if I had explained things more clearly from the beginning. That is why I try to consider my child’s perspective. If he doesn’t understand why we do things or understand why the rules are there, he won’t listen.

In a million ways the home is our first school. We learn and grow at home. And as a homeschool parent, I love how the Lord instructs us in this verse to go home and ponder and learn. I want to be learning my whole life.  

Family Matters

I am so grateful for the good advice in the scriptures. God wants us to be better people, and treat each other better. When I was a teenager my brothers and I fought constantly. It was stressful and pretty awful to be at home. I hid in my room most of the time. Looking back I really feel bad about my part in creating an environment like that. My poor parents!

I want a peaceful home and a happy family. I think we all do. And most days we do pretty well. But every family has struggles, and the scriptures were written with our best interests in mind, to be our guide. God wants us to succeed in everything we do. Our families are an eternal part of the plan of happiness. I am so grateful for God’s word and His guidance in our lives. 

What are your favorite scriptures and what have they taught you? I’d love to hear it.