For me, this Lent is about changing the way I understand and relate to fear.
The first step on my Lenten journey is recognizing fear. Another step toward giving up my fear is appreciating it, becoming more friendly toward it. Another step is letting go of fear. Another step is being authentic.
Each step of this journey has lead me to a deeper understanding of fear. Each step has helped me relate to my fear in new ways.
The next step for me is the understanding that there is no room for fear in love.
I become less fearful as I learn to love myself, other people, and God more completely. As I become wiser at loving, I become more fearless.
My fear is rooted in my perception that I am not worthy of being loved. I have convinced myself that I do not deserve the deepest desires of my heart because I am not perfect. I hold myself to a standard of perfection, and project that standard on the world around me and on everything that is Divine. I have convinced myself that if only I were perfect I would deserve what I want most.
Ironically, the perceptions I developed to protect myself become the foundations of the walls that keep me from loving my truest self. What I fear most is myself.
As I learn to love more completely, I realize that my fears are not real. As I grow to recognize the love that surrounds me and the love that I reflect back into the world, I am overcoming my fear.
The lessons of this Lent help me, day by day, appreciate myself in new ways. They are deep, and will shape my contemplation and my action well past the end of Lent on Sunday.
What do you fear most?
What lessons are you learning?
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