Losing and Gaining

My most significant experiences so far this year have been losses.

On New Year’s Day I watched the Wisconsin Badgers lose a football bowl game which was not the Rose Bowl. A few days later, I watched the Green Bay Packers lose a playoff game in the cold and snow.

It is true that I have witnessed both teams lose before. It is also true, as people have reminded me, that both teams are likely to improve next season.

There is always next season; this season is over, ending with losses.

We appear to be consumed with winning. We fill our time with contests in which there are winners and losers. We believe that competition helps us live wisely. We choose our leaders through elections, and the winners get to make the decisions. We trust competition to give us justice. We celebrate winners and keep track of gold medals.

We believe that winning shows we have learned valuable lessons.

I enjoy winning at least as much as anyone else, but it is the times I have lost that I remember.

I have lost elections, arguments, and courtroom trials. I have lost friends, lost innocence, lost interest.

I have learned at least as much by losing as I have by winning. Losing teaches me deep truths about myself that I often would rather not see. Losing shows me whether I can handle the experience of losing well.

I continue to set goals and work hard, to celebrate victories and winning. It is often the losing that puts me in touch with my best self. What kind of person would I have become if I had never experienced loss?

What is the most important lesson you have learned from losing?

When was the deepest loss you have experienced, so far?

[Image by Lenore Edman]