A Jack Bauer-rich moment

I rarely laugh so hard that I’m holding my sides, but listmaker’s comments regarding Special Agent Jack Bauer at Polipundit got me. It’s brilliant. My favorites:

6) Jack Bauer got Hellen Keller to talk.
16) When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer f*cking hates lemonade.
17) In grade school, a little boy punched Kimberly Bauer, and Kimberly ran home to tell her dad. That little boy’s name? Stephen Hawking.
20) In kindergarten, Jack Bauer killed a terrorist for Show and Tell.
23) Jack Bauer’s family threw him a surprise birthday party when he was a child. Once.
(H/T ABP)

More fun: Jack Bauer on privacy.
Jack Bauer’s Job Performance Last Night: Restraint Or Just Plain Laziness?
Dave Barry on Jack
a thoughtful Lorie Byrd.
NRO pipes in