Serial The Anointed: 10. The Leader As The Alpha Stag

A silhouette of a man lifting his hands in worship against a backdrop of an evening sky. Next to this man are the words: "The Anointed - a faith-based serial." — Follow along with this thrilling serial about the highs and lows of Pastor John.

It’s 2015. John gains national attention with his show ‘Time for Joy’ on national television. Nathan, the pastor of an ’emerging’ church in New York, makes me think about John’s leadership.

The regional television broadcasts of the Joy Church’s services go national. John is now on national television every week. Every Sunday morning from ten to eleven, the whole of the States can watch ‘Time for Joy’ on Ion Television, hosted by John and Abigail. The cost of this airtime to the community is unknown, but there’s much speculation about it on internet forums and blogs.

‘Does John still have real friends in his life? It must be a lonely world at the top of success.’

John now has a national status as an evangelical leader. And why not, with a congregation of nearly six thousand attendees. He is the director of multiple evangelical foundations and associations. It seems to go well for him, but I am not at ease. This could end badly. Who in the church and in the evangelical world can and dares to stand up to John now? Many who tried in the past are now burned out at home. John’s elders’ council is full of yes-men. No one is stopping the distortion that has unconsciously occurred over the years. When I meet John at leaders’ meetings, there’s a lot of hugging, but does John still have real friends in his life? People who can tell John what they think and feel, who can slow him down and redirect him? I’m afraid not! It must be a lonely world at the top of success.

I myself have just gone through a series of fifteen supervision conversations with a Christian counselor for the second time in my life. I’m again amazed at the blind spots in my work, the distortion in my ministry and motivation. I’ve had to make many adjustments. Would someone like John dare to open himself up to supervision? Knowing John, he’s still insecure. I’m afraid he still has the compulsion to prove himself to his father; he’s trying to fill a void with success.

‘Why does a man need to elevate himself above another? And what should my attitude towards him be?’

It’s 2017. Jessie and I organize an evening at our home for people involved in the ’emerging church’ and new forms of church. We are with a group of thirty people. During dinner, I talk with Nathan, the young pastor of a new community in New York city. He tells me that he is part of the pastors’ meeting in New York and how difficult he finds it to deal with John in a good way. Nathan and his wife have welcomed many former members of the Joy Church in recent years and have heard so many negative stories that he struggles to maintain a healthy relationship with John.

“Why would a pastor, a man of God, put titles like senior pastor, apostle, CEO, or even doctor before or after his name? It reminds me of a pack of stags, where the most dominant male not only marks his territory but also sprays himself with his urine to emit a strong scent and reinforce his dominance. What role does this play in the kingdom of God? Why does one have to elevate themselves above another? And what should my attitude towards him be? Should I bow or crawl like a young stag? Or should I fight him and see who is the strongest? What should I do?”

‘The alpha stag is driven by primal instincts and fears. To secure his position in the herd, he adopts a dominant stance.’

I sense his frustration. “What does the forest ranger do?” I ask him. Nathan laughs and then shakes his head. “No, you’re not getting off that easily. The forest ranger became a stag himself.” I understand where he’s going. Even Jesus became a man. I need to think about this. Then I say, “The stag is driven by primal instincts and fears. He must show all these signs of dominance because he is afraid for his position within the herd. His goal is to mate with the entire herd. His fear is that another stag will defeat and drive him away. I think the key lies in becoming aware of your primal instincts and fears. Our forest ranger who became a stag had only one primal instinct: to do what the Father does. He might have had fears, but he did not let these fears lead him, because he trusted the Father. Someone like John might also be driven by primal instincts and fears, which is why he puts on such a dominant posture.”

Nathan wants to say something, but I continue… “I also struggle with those two. I long for the safety and security of trusting the Father and doing what He asks of me. But I also feel the emptiness inside me. An emptiness that fills up so easily and well with primal instincts and fears. It’s like a monster inside me that I have to fight, otherwise it will overpower me. In John’s case, I’m afraid that this monster is still invisible to him and he can’t fight this battle yet. It’s easy for me to judge John, but in doing so, I’m also judging myself.”

‘Marriages and families are being destroyed. Women are advised to kick out their husbands if they speak negatively about the church.’

Nathan is not satisfied with my answer. “But what about the victims he and his wife create? They’ve been coming to our church for years with their wounds, pain, and stories. You wouldn’t believe what I’ve heard. Marriages have been destroyed because, for example, the husband left the church, and the wife chose to remain loyal to Pastor John. Abigail, his wife, told women in the church to kick out their husbands if they spoke negatively about the church. There are women who have become clones of Abigail. Children are discouraged from seeing their parents if they have left the church. It’s unheard of! Couples who start dating must first talk to the pastor before speaking to their parents. Those two worm their way into families and marriages and destroy everything. It takes us hours and hours of pastoral care. The brokenness and pain I’ve seen…”

‘How can it be that someone so wrong can still command so much authority?’

“And then there’s the attitude of John and Abigail in their leadership and their wealth,” Nathan continues. “On the outside, they seem like real shepherds. They appear to keep the flock together and lead the sheep to green pastures. But they have no desire to get down on their hands and knees among them and chew grass with them. They abuse their power and position and enrich themselves at the expense of the people. And then he comes to the pastors’ meeting with an attitude of ‘look at me.’ Everyone bows to him. He, who halved entire churches in New York twenty years ago, now wants to fight for the unity of the city, naturally with him at the head. Pastors whose hearts he broke twenty years ago and who still hear stories about his mismanagement every month, now give him all the space again. Well, not me! I know it sounds unchristian, but sometimes I wish I could break both his legs. That man destroys so much. How can it be that someone so wrong can still command so much authority?”

I understand his anger but don’t know what to answer him. I also see that John copies his brokenness in others. It’s a huge responsibility. I wouldn’t want to be in his shoes.

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Matt Vlaardingerbroek, a former seasoned church planter and pastor in Holland’s inner cities, brings Bible stories to life through ventriloquism and magic. He’s authored three books, and founded www.creativekidswork.com, providing over 1,500 innovative Sunday school activities worldwide.