My husband and I were talking about this post and it brought up a common discussion in our marriage: that I panic an awful lot. I live with a pretty high level of anxiety and worry. I worry over not doing enough, not being productive enough, not squeezing every bit of meaning out of every moment. I assumed that everyone lives that way but then I met Brad and found out that it is possible to feel content and like... Read more
How have I been doing on my plans? Pretty well! 1) Flylady. We’re still going strong with keeping the house tidy. I’m not doing everything on Flylady yet, but I go easy on myself and stick with the basics. My kitchen has been clear most evenings (and when it isn’t I get it done first thing the next morning). I’m feeling really good about it. 2) Doing the extra step. Also going well. For example, at work I saw a... Read more
There’s a weird feeling I get these days because meditation and mindfulness are so popular. It’s odd living in a world where people are likely to know some form of meditation or yoga or Eastern philosophy. When I was growing up meditation was just something that movies made fun of with dramatic leg poses and exaggerated Oms. I felt a defensive pride that I knew what meditation really was. It was something that me and my family did. It was... Read more
Someone recently asked me this question and it really surprised me. It’s not something that ever occurred to me. But I can see what she meant. Like if one God has more worshipers than another do they rub it in each other’s faces? At first this seemed pretty ridiculous to me. But then I thought about all the stories and myths around the Gods and some of those stories do involve competitiveness and one-upmanship. At first I think that since... Read more
People often urge you to make every moment count, to live life to the fullest, to remember that you never know when you might die and you don’t want to have regrets. I live in tremendous fear of those statements (I know, I have a lot of fears!) Part of the fear of death that I have is that I fear having regret, not getting everything out of life possible, wasting time, wasting the enormous opportunity of a human embodiment.... Read more
I have been trying to figure out why I have the pattern I do with jobs. When I first start a new job, I love it. Doesn’t matter what it is. It can be data entry and I love it. A few months down the road I start getting bored and then resentful and eventually I’m dreading going into work and having intense anxiety during all of my free time. This pattern has repeated over and over and over. I’ve... Read more
When we’re teenagers we’re often encouraged to start thinking about our long term plans. At least by your early twenties you are setting up your path to take you to whatever profession you (or your parents) have planned. You take the steps you need to get there. But sometimes years down the road you find that you actually don’t enjoy the thing that you thought you were going to love. The entire plan you made was for a life you... Read more
Goal One: Take the Extra Step I love a clean, clear, clutter-free space. I feel anxiety and depression lift when I am in a room that is neat, tidy, and comfortably decorated. I’ve always longed to create those spaces in my home. Since I was a child I wanted to be a housewife and make my home radiate peace and beauty. That goal has over the years butted up against an inner nature that tends towards tamas. I don’t say... Read more
You all may remember that I revamped my diet on the advice of the book WomanCode by Alissa Vitti. To help heal my PCOS, which is causing infertility, I cut out simple carbs and cut down on sugars. I’m still doing it, four months later, keeping both a low-carb AND mostly vegan diet. It can be done! So is it working? Yes, it definitely is! It’s astounding to see how much of an effect diet really does have on your... Read more
Having observed myself now for 33 years there are some things I do know about what makes me happier and unhappier… Things That Make Me Happy A clear, bright, clutter-free space Being free to pursue spontaneous trips, visits, and activities Learning new things Getting out of the house at least once a day Helping people (even if it’s as simple as showing them where something is in the grocery store) Bhajan group Feeling productive Things That Make Me Unhappy Feeling... Read more
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