Wrestling With Yourself 
Day 81 of 90 straight days of hot yoga at Modo Yoga and I entered practice today with a little humility. During this process of practice I have been taking it one day at time. If I think of the number of days, it throws me off. So it has been quite humbling to practice everyday and the challenge off my mat has been balancing my life with a practice everyday, but I have done it. I have done it because I have learned having a practice of any kind matters. So when things go another way or life changes direction, I have something to go too and remind me of who I am in the middle of all of this. During the 81 days I have learned the importance of breathing, no so much through anything, but with it. To accept everything as it is, including the sensations, feelings, thoughts, and everything as it is. By practicing this way on my mat and off it has allowed lots of things to flow on by.
Today my practice was with teacher Carolina, it was a wonderful flow class filled with lots of reminders. At one point we were laying down and she reminded us to just let it all go. Funny how difficult it is, because when this life is over, we will have to let it go. And we won’t have a choice in the matter. I find it empowering to have the choice to let it go now. I choose to let it go and let it flow. Why hold on? Why do we hold on to anything or anybody? And does the answer matter. The breath holds on to nothing.
Look all the stuff that you think matters in your life, and ask yourself why? Why does the past matter? Why does the future matter? Why does what others say matter? Why do our thoughts matter so much? What is thinking? What is a thought? Who is noticing the thoughts? We spend so much time rushing around, avoiding the present moment, that we miss now. We miss the only thing that really matters to us. The only place where change is natural and normal. We act as if change is an intrusive thing. It is not. Change is normal.I discovered in practice today the opportunity to follow what Bruce Lee said, “When you punch, you punch not with your right hand, the punch comes from the whole being”. So now when I practice, I practice to be full in every pose, give my fullness to it. Breath into it, expand, celebrate my being now. Yoga is life.
On to day 82…Namaste
David Matthew Brown
