Happy Thanksgiving Perspective

Happy Thanksgiving Perspective November 26, 2015

givethanks2I woke up to my phone dinging around midnight, only to answer and have them hang up. Instead of getting upset, I thought myself grateful as it wasn’t an emergency call from or about one of my kids or family members. So I took the opportunity to turn on the Christmas tree lights and ponder.

Life is rarely calm, is it? Ten years ago my mom crossed over, which set off a domino effect of me becoming ill and then my husband, Chuck, losing his job. It felt like the end of the world, and it continued to feel like that up until a couple years back when I decided to stop festering over the negative of it all and see the positives in it all.

My mom was always ill. For pretty much as long as I could remember. She was depressed. She missed her family who had passed, and she never lived life. Two nights ago I dreamt that she was sitting on a pier with my grandpa, her dad. My grandpa was fishing, but my mom was admiring a diamond ring she was wearing. Mom loved jewelry and my dad did his best on his blue collar wages to supply her a meek diamond gift when he could. She asked me to look at her ring, and she explained that the different color stones weren’t gems, they were diamonds. Her smile was brighter than I’d ever seen it in this life. She was happy.

I remember the first Thanksgiving without my mom.  I didn’t even want to celebrate, but with the kids and all, I knew it had to be done.  Paste the smile on my face and remember how much mom complained year after year how much work Thanksgiving was, how eating took 10 minutes and the cleanup hours.  I tried to giggle as I chopped onions (stuffing it in the closet of nevermore), but instead I started crying. The onions were a good excuse for the tears. It was then that my Spirit Guides gave me a profound message  – ‘Invite her’.  I wasn’t sure I heard that right and I asked them to expand.  They told me that on the Other Side the loved ones gather to join their families here on This Side, but need an invitation.  They want to be with us just as much as we want to be with them.  So before you sit down at your Thanksgiving dinner, ask your loved ones on the Other Side to join you for the celebration.  They think of you, just as you think of them.  Laugh and cry and begin to feel, which will help you to heal.  I know my mom LOVES Thanksgiving now because she doesn’t have to cook OR clean up, and I’m sure she will be wearing her new diamond ring.

As for me being ill afterwards? It helped me gain the confidence to quit my corporate job to do what I do now – coach, speak and write. And the loss of my husband’s job? He was able to be home to help with the kids, my dad, and his mom, and most of all help as I worked 20 hours a day building up my business. He got up early to take the kids to school and pick them up from practice. He did (still does) the laundry, help with cleaning and cooking and errands. He has also been able to spend time helping me with my events, whether just being there for moral support or driving me to make sure that I got there and back safely.  His job loss ended up being the best thing that happened. I think that instead of us holding on to the stress of the situation, we have instead bonded as partners.  As the whole saying goes, “What doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger.”

How many times have you experienced a stressful incident only to have a whole load of stressful incidences come tumbling on top of you?  You shove the issues into a closet and keep shoving, and shoving and shoving until one day you have to open that closet and then the avalanche of emotion hits?  All too often, I bet.  Maybe it’s time to clean out the closet, thank the Universe for the issues and the ability to resolve them – whether filing them properly away or throwing them out for good. And know that not everything will be neatly resolved, but maybe, just maybe, the stresses aren’t there to hurt you, but to help you. Next time you’re stressed – take a step back inhale and laugh. Remember who you are and why you’re here. You’re never given anything in this world that you can’t handle. You are strong. Be flexible, love yourself and love others, and always remember just keep moving forward.

Today, and everyday, I am thankful for a wonderful family, a job that I love to do, the ability to share my tales and most of all I am thankful for each one of you.

Wishing you and yours a very Happy Thanksgiving. May your loved ones, whether here or crossed, find the path into your heart today.

Believe,

Kristy


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