AskAngus4: I have a Dream, about Jesus on a UFO

Dear Ask Angus,

Briony: How do you know if your having or have had a “witch dream”? Being a person that rarely if ever remembers a dream, this is my quandary. I only remember my lucid dreams, very vivid and in color, etc. What makes a witch dream stand out?

Dear Briony,

Ooh! New term alert! I honestly had never heard of the term “Witch Dream” before. But that’s not too surprising. I rarely make any distinction between my religious life and my mundane life. To me “Witch Dream” is a redundant phrase. Every dream I have is a Witch Dream, just like every hike I take is a Pagan Hike, and every corn fritter I eat is the Holy Eucharist.

It’s like in those bad ‘B’ Sci-Fi movies, where all of the cheap sets and props are rendered more ‘realistic’ by adjoining the moniker “Space” ahead of the item: “Space Food!” “Space Gun!” “Space Blonde!” and so on.

So I was unfamiliar with the term. (I never claim to know everything, dear Constant Reader, just to have an opinion on everything.) So I we’re-not-supposed-to-Google-things-cuz-they’re-all-corporate-now and found the following responses to my query:

  1. KEY WORDS : bad luck, feeling cursed, Evil, mother in law, manipulative, interfering, scheming
  2. SEE ALSO : Zombies : Werewolf : Vampires : Death : Demons : Hauntings : Guns : Fights : Knives : Intruders : Rapes : Harry Potter :

So it appears that the Intertubes will not be helping us in this quest. (*sigh)

My thinking, Dear Briony, is this: Does the Goddess (sub in the Diety of your choice) speak to me in my dreams? You bet’cha! But She (he, it, they) also speak to me through my morning glass of Strawberry Quik. If the Dark Lady has something she needs me to know, then She will SPEAK TO ME, through every available portal, dimension, and orifice.

And she will continue to hound me until I finally flippin’ GET IT.

So if you have a non-lucid dream that stays with you, then yes, this could very well be a communication from the Great Beyond. And you best starting get some action under your belt pronto, because when the Goddess starts tapping her foot in frustration, worlds are shaken.

Dear Ask Angus,

Anith: One of the earliest things I was taught was to always invoke the goddess first and devoke her last, because she is All, and the god is contained within her.  But I notice it happens differently in some rituals I’ve attended– and sometimes might make some kind of internal sense based on the time of year or focus of the ritual.  Do they just not know, or are they doing it on purpose?  If it is on purpose, what is the rationale?

Dear Anith,

Ah yes, the sacred pecking order of the Dramatis Personae. Everybody learns just one of the 6* ways to do this, and we stick to it for years, decades, lifetimes. But here’s the thing:

  • Group A over there does it in a different order (Say, cast, quarters, Goddess, God and then devoke them in the SAME ORDER). Do you see their circle suddenly enveloped in fire?
  • Group B over yonder waves their arms around vaguely and then invokes 18 different dieties and then starts the Working. Do you see their circle suddenly disappear in a sinkhole of poison gas?
  • For that matter Group C puts on their Nice Clothes and goes to a special building one day a week and prays earnestly for direction to be provided by their Savior. Do you see their congregation suddenly vaporize in a phaser blast from the orbiting starship U.S.S. Christalmighty?

Nope, nope, and gee-that-would-be-kinda-cool-but-nope.

Each group, trad, path and solitary finds a way to get the ‘ol Ritual ball rolling that works for them. And that’s the point: It does work for them. Everybody’s way works. Whatever gets you across the threshold and in the presence of the Divine is the way that works for you.

(Its when we puny hu-mans make the logical fallacy misstep that just because it works for me then it must be the One, Right, True and Only way for everyone to do it – that worlds are shaken.)

My belief is that Diety is much more interested in our intent than our procedure.

So, Dear Anith, in short: Yes, they DO know exactly what they are doing, and yes, they are doing it on purpose. What is their purpose in doing it in that order? Beats me, but after the ritual let’s go ask ‘em and learn a little about their belief system. That sounds like fun to me.

~ Ask Angus

Send your questions to:

*number pulled directly from the aether (‘aether’ is here pronounced as “my ass”)

About Angus McMahan

Me? I'm just the drummer. Oh, I guess I write funny stuff now and then. When I am not scratching my head at the oddball questions that show up here I am penning witticisms over at

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    • Angus McMahan

      Ah, I love auto-bot comments. I have the warm fuzzies now…..

  • Admiral Wife

    It’s been way too long since I made you corn fritters.

    • Angus McMahan

      Mmmmmm……..after Solaris, K?

  • Annika Mongan

    The ritual that sticks in my mind the most from Pantheacon – besides the obvious highlight of the Feri Pagan Tent Revival – was also the least formal. The circle was cast using a stick from a parking lot bush, waived around in a circle several times, invoking directions and elements at random. Our facilitator warned us that she was a kitchen witch and we were about to see the least formal circle casting. It would have been hilarious – if it hadn’t been so intensely powerful, vibrating with sincerity and holding space for a deeply moving ritual.

    • Angus McMahan

      Illustrates my point perfectly. Thank you!

  • Kilmrnock

    Aye we all do ritual a wee bit different but for the same reasons , to get close to / honor our own concept of deity . Not all of us are Wiccan , Some are polytheistic , or Reconstructionists , Recons for short are also polytheist. We worship a large Family of related , ethnic gods . The pantheon of our ancestors . My wife is a polytheistic eclectic witch , so we pagans come in many flavors and ways of communicating with deity .Altho Wicca is still the largest, Best known form or type of pagan , They are not the only ones . There are others of us out here , I’m a CR , Celtic Recon myself .this one is directed at Anith

    • Angus McMahan

      Understood. And good points, Kilm. I strive towards a middle ground with regards to Paganism – common ground, if you will – and unfortunately I do not have the space to list all the different trads and their ways of handling a particular ‘problem’. But again, like I said up there, Whatever gets you to where you need to go. :-)