Tea Party Rappers Obliterate Rap Forever

Bummer about this Tea Party rap group, THE WOLVERINES!, destroying rap forever.

Catch how, right at the top of this gritty homage to the smug thug life, they refer to Obama as “boy.” Twice.

And then there’s Molotov, the disgruntled gangsta baker. (“I used to be a pie baker. Look into my eyes. All you’ll see is pies.” OUCH.)

And bringin’ it right home is second runner-up in the Sarah Palin look-alike contest, rapper Constitution Kate.

Say, if I posted my home address, do you think any one of you out there could swing by my place in about ten or fifteen minutes, and kill me?

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About John Shore

John Shore (who, fwiw, is straight) is the author of UNFAIR: Christians and the LGBT Question, and three other great books. He is founder of Unfundamentalist Christians (on Facebook here), and executive editor of the Unfundamentalist Christians group blog.  (In total John's two blogs receive some 250,000 views per month.) John is also co-founder of The NALT Christians Project, which was written about by TIME,  The Washington Post, and others. His website is JohnShore.com. John is a pastor ordained by The Progressive Christian Alliance. You're invited to like John's Facebook page. And don't forget to sign up for his mucho awesome monthly newsletter.

  • http://sparklingbytheway.wordpress.com sparklingbytheway

    I….um….well….hhmmmmm…not quite sure what to say to that….the production value in the first minute and a half was reasonable…I lost interest after that. Not a big fan of the rap music….

  • Allen

    interesting, I only made it just over 1:30 into it as well. Somehow, the guy saying public education made him stupid, and appearing to be already in his 20's, didn't seem to lay the blame at Obama's door. I do believe he's been President for less than 3 semesters.

  • Jeannie

    Well, I can't say you didn't warn me. I honestly don't remember ever seeing anything else that was as big of a train wreck as this production.

    Well, the young man did admit to being stupid.

    A while back I was on a political forum where a supporter of Bush's second term said he was voting for Bush just so he would have to be around to fix his mess. That kind of brilliant intellect is clearly at work in this rap.

  • mike

    Disgusting, is al I can say

  • http://kenreads.wordpress.com wken

    I made it all the way through!

    And therefore got to meet the twit who introduced himself as "hard-core birther."

    Uggh.

  • http://soiledwings.com Sherry Meneley

    LOL – all I could do was laugh… Honestly I thought this was a parody, it had a Weird Al Yank-ish-ness. Truly need to watch the whole thing for the awesomeness of the nightmare.

    And to think, I kinda liked rap; wait does Sugarhill Gang's Rappers Delight count? No? okay nevermind…

    • Diana

      Oh, please–Weird Al Yankovic is a lot better than this!

  • Linda Chimienti

    I've watched it three times now, stubbornly trying to understand all the words. Constitution Kate is kinda cute. (Reminds me of Helen Hunt.) I'd say her argument is the strongest of the three. But let's ask Angelina. All I know for sure is that I've got the chorus memorized… shame on me, shame on we…

  • http://living3dfaith.blogspot.com/ Tim

    Oh please…RAP can die. I promise I won't cry. I thought the Sarah Palin character was underplayed. Someone here commented that she was cute in a Helen Hunt sort of way? Yes! Also that guy at the end in the sleeveless white button shirt and the headband trying to be Springsteen, I think.

    Anyhow….I've always thought RAP to be the spawn of musically talentless booze guzzlin, cop killin, woman hatin, gold teef wearin thugs. Without the rich white fan base tryin' real hard to dress, talk, move, and act like a homie from some Crooklyn ghetto in Bed Stuy, they'd all be rollin down the street, smokin indo, sippin on gin and juice—Laid back [with their mind on their pecker and their pecker on their mind]

    When white people RAP, it's just even that much more embarrassing.

    • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

      U da man, Tim. But (for what it's worth) I actually have a whole different view of rap. I like a lot of it. And the large amount of rap that I like, I like a LOT. I'm basically pretty much a fan of (good) rap. Good, strong, oftentimes amazingly intricate beats; lots of … bravado. What's not to like? Besides the horrible misogyny and gratuitous glorification of violence, I mean.

      I'm a pretty major fan of Eminem.

      • Christie

        I knew there were other reasons to like you, John :-)

  • http://asad123.wordpress.com asad123

    Despite what this song says, a mosque after Ramadan smells lovely. Like roses and sandalwood.

  • Jason Hurt

    Wow, she sounds bad even with autotune.

    • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/johnshore/ John Shore

      HAR!! But seriously. Kill me.

  • Karen

    omg…I am speechless…I agree with Allen that the “rapper” would have been in public school when Dubya was playing president, with his “No Child Left Behind” garbage. Thanks for sharing this John. I now have to go and gouge my eyes out and bust my eardrums. I can’t get that woman’s autotuned voice out of my head.

  • Tom Brisson

    Major suckage. Racist, too.

  • Linda B

    Seriously, these people think they are helping the TP? Just gave me another reason to feed Palin and her ilk to the Bears… The home boy referesnce I get, not agree with it but the President did run on a I am one of you platform but as usuall once in DC you morph into soem sort of ailen unreconizble to the folk back home.

    So sad…….

  • AboundingJoy

    If there were ever a sight that I wish I could unsee, that would be it. I am actively and urgently repressing all memories of that video as quickly as I can. Fortunately I am old enough that I don’t understand most rap lyrics. Unfortunately, they are such poor rappers that I understood too much if what they were saying.

  • Rebecca

    Let me say up front that I enjoy rap. In that context, I’d like to say this is some of the worst rap I’ve ever had the misfortune of hearing. “Suck” doesn’t cover it.

    • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/johnshore/ John Shore

      Right? It makes the back of my neck ache.

  • Javajunki

    She’s probably got a swastika tattoo under those pants

  • peet

    People argue that there is such a thing as conservative art. From now on, this is my Exhibit A rebuttal.

  • http://spierlee@yahoo.com Rev Nancy Spier-Lee

    I’m thinkin’ they got the old adage “Fool me once” backassward. “Fool me once, shame on you … Fool me twice, shame on me.” And they’re wondering why we’re not out of Iraq … I always wondered why we were IN Iraq in the first place. I suggest they keep their day jobs … makin’ pies, playin’ in the sand … whatever

  • http://thethreews.wordpress.com Ken Leonard

    I wonder if these jokers are still around. Maybe they should have been invited to the Inauguration yesterday.

    You know, for the irony.


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