SVS: “Shaolin Soccer”

After a hectic day of Full-Blown InterWebbing, I feel like something mindless is what I want tonight. And I’m probably not alone.

I’m not going “mindless” like Transformers IV, though. I’m worn down (and out), sure. But I’m not cruel.  And watching that one won’t be good for what ails you; it’ll just make you feel worse.

Instead, I’m going with Shaolin Soccer, which is currently streaming on NETFLIX INSTANT, YOUTUBE($), AMAZON INSTANT($), and SOME OTHERS. And which is “mindless” not because there’s nothing on its mind, but because it’s flat-out lost it.

It’s insane. And hilarious, though I’m sorry to say that Netflix doesn’t have the dubbed version, which brings an entirely new level of hilarity to the proceedings.

A down-on-his-luck ex-soccer player, injured during a rigged match, joins forces with a former monk to assemble an unlikely team of players — the monk’s awkward Shaolin brothers — harnessing the discipline and power of kung fu.

If you’ve read that description and watched that trailer and still don’t want to watch Stephen Chow’s Most Unsane Underdog Sports Story Of All Time, I don’t know what to say. Other than reminding you that the action is just non-stop nuts, hopelessly implausible, and a ton of fun. And besides, soccer and kung fu, right?

Oh, and “Give it a try. If you can think of anything else while you’re watching it, I’ll eat my hat.” (Except I won’t. Not really. Who do you take me for? Werner Herzog?)

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