This morning’s full moon visited us with a lot of feisty emotion. Many might’ve not been able to sleep the night before, the fire of the moon raging within. Full moons effect everyone differently, but for me they make me overly emotional and anxious. I was one of those who didn’t sleep, but it wasn’t simply the full moon.
Being a military mom isn’t an easy one. I was a military mom-in-law for four years, and then suddenly that military club continued when my son decided to take that journey along with his college career. I told him I supported him, I loved him, but I didn’t like it. You see, it was him, his sister, and I for years. We were a team. When he was born he had to have many surgeries and each time I handed him over to the surgeons I would pray, trust, and cry when he wasn’t looking. When I dropped him off for college, I trusted, prayed, and yes I cried. But with him at college I could call, text, social media, and show up there if I needed to (I never did). So when I so-called handed him over to the military, I thought I’d be prepared. I wasn’t.
I’ve always been in tune with both my kids. If they were away and had a tummy ache, I had one. If they were crying, I felt like crying. If they were happy, I feel that. Last night I woke up crying from a dream just as a text from my son rang through at 3-ish am. My head pounding. My heart racing. He was being picked up to start his journey and it would be the last text I’d have from him until he graduates at end of summer. I posted something on social media only to receive comments such as ‘get a grip’ to ‘what’s the big deal?’ Well, I have a grip, thanks. It is a big deal, not summer camp. Don’t cross a mom, though, especially during a full moon.
One of the hardest things as a mom is knowing there will be a time to release your child to spread his wings. It’s always been my natural instinct to keep my kids safe, but independent. But to know that I can no longer be ‘momma bear’ isn’t just releasing him to spread his wings, but healing my own wings to prepare myself for a new phase of mom. Those wings, however, will still be a nurturer. I will be his biggest cheerleader and will forever and always be his mom no matter how old he is or how much he needs me or doesn’t need me.
You’ve probably been feeling the moon energy for a couple days already and will feel it for the next couple. Some feel energized, others agitated. Anything that is in disharmony will feel abrasive. This moon gives you the opportunity to clear away the emotional baggage of the year. Any unfulfilled dreams or wishes may be making you feel wistful and frustrated. The good thing is this full moon offers you the opportunity to reinvent yourself or give sail to your dreams. It helps you cross so-called friends, projects, and empty dreams off to make room for new blooms. And watch out for Momma Bears.