Megyn Kelly has had quite a few months. First, she dove headlong into the defense of pedophilia by suggesting that the 15-year-old girls Epstein trafficked weren’t really children-children, because, in her words, they weren’t “8-year-olds” but “barely legal.”
Hey Megyn: “Barely legal” is porn-site language. “Barely legal” is three years away from legal. “Barely legal” is what gross men say when they want to fantasize about kids without admitting they’re fantasizing about kids.
But Megyn Kelly—self-appointed moral compass of MAGA Christianity—apparently sees the victims of sexual abuse as close enough to adulthood that we shouldn’t get too worked up about it.
And then, almost on cue, she pivoted from softening pedophilia to bloodlust, declaring on air:
“I’d really like to see them [supposed drug traffickers in the Caribbean] suffer. I would like Trump and Hegseth to make it last a long time so they lose a limb and bleed out.”
This is the woman who wants you to believe she’s a Christian. This is the woman lecturing America about morality. This is the woman scolding the rest of us for not being “tough enough” on America’s enemies.
Apparently in her worldview, 15-year-old trafficking victims are basically adults while adult victims of U.S. military crimes are basically animals.
The Gospel According to Megyn Kelly
What Kelly is preaching is not Christianity. Instead, it’s American sadism wrapped in the language of righteousness.
Jesus says, “Blessed are the merciful.”
Megyn Kelly says, “I’d really like to see them suffer.”Jesus says, “Love your enemies.”
Megyn Kelly says, “Make it last a long time so they bleed out.”Jesus heals his persecutors.
Megyn Kelly wants to watch people die slowly on international television.
If you want a stark contrast between the Jesus of the Gospels and the Jesus of modern right-wing media, look no further than Megyn.
Even God Doesn’t Delight in Suffering
Now, let’s bring the Bible into this, since Megyn claims it as her authority. Scripture is clear: God does not delight in the death of the wicked (Ezekiel 33:11). Now pause and consider that.
Even the wicked. Even the ones actually guilty. Even the people who have committed violence, exploitation, oppression. God does not relish their pain.
Meanwhile, Megyn Kelly is out here salivating over the idea of men—whose guilt is unknown, whose identities are unknown, whose humanity she doesn’t even consider—bleeding out under U.S. firepower.
This is what happens when you baptize cruelty, sacralize war, and turn human suffering into entertainment for a political tribe that has forgotten how to feel anything except rage.
Wicked? We Don’t Even Ask
And here’s the thing the Kellys of the world refuse to face: We don’t even know who these people are. Some of them might be enemy combatants (even though we aren’t at war). Some might not. Some might have done terrible things. Some might have done nothing but exist in the wrong place. But we’re not giving an ounce of due process. We’re just dropping bombs from the heavens and killing indiscriminately. And American Christian commentators are getting off on it.
This is how far the conscience has decayed.
If You Cheer for Suffering, You’re Not Following Jesus
If your heart thrills at the idea of slow death, you are not following Jesus.
Full stop.
If you see a human being and your first instinct is to imagine how they might “deserve” to lose a limb, your faith is not Christianity. It’s cruelty dressed in drab Sunday clothes.
Jesus gave his life to end cycles of violence.
Megyn Kelly wants the violence televised.Jesus welcomed children with open arms.
Megyn Kelly downplays their abuse and calls them “barely legal.”Jesus sat with the oppressed and cried with them.
Megyn Kelly cheers for their suffering and calls it strength.
The Movement of Calloused Hearts
Christian Nationalism is producing a generation of people who no longer have the ability or desire to imagine that the people we kill are human beings. It has turned empathy into weakness. It has turned compassion into cowardice. It has turned cruelty into a sacrament. And Megyn Kelly, with millions of sycophantic viewers nodding along, is its high priestess.
A Final Word for Those Who Still Claim Jesus
If you’re a Christian who finds yourself applauding statements like Kelly’s, then ask yourself this: Where in the life of Jesus—the actual brown, poor, immigrant Jesus—do you see him celebrating the suffering of anyone? Not the Romans. Not the Pharisees. Not the people who tortured him. Not even the ones who nailed him to a cross. Instead, he asked his Father to forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing (Luke 23:34).
If God does not delight in the suffering of the wicked, what does it say about a movement that delights in the suffering of the unknown? Megyn Kelly has chosen cruelty but you don’t have to.
If you’re navigating faith after certainty, loving Jesus but not the empire, or trying to hold on to hope in a burning world, you’re not alone. I explore these themes weekly on the Heretic Happy Hour podcast.
You can also explore my books—including Heretic!, The Wisdom of Hobbits, and others—right here: https://quoir.com/authors/matthew-j-distefano/
Thanks for reading. Thanks for thinking. And thanks for refusing to settle for easy answers.
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