My wife Ashley and I have spent the last five years interviewing couples, researching and learning all we can about what truly makes a marriage work. We’ve boiled everything we’ve learned down to the four factors we believe should be present in EVERY healthy marriage. I want to share this with you, because I’m convinced this could make an instant impact in your marriage.
Below is a brief description of each of these four factors. In addition to the text below, we’ve also shared more of our findings in a free video you can watch here:
This video is part of our new online program which you can access at: FightingForMyMarriage.com
The Four Keys to a Stronger Marriage are (in no particular order)…
1.Make Communication a Daily Priority.
Just like dollars are the currency of our economy, Time is the “currency of relationships.” If you want to invest into your marriage, start by investing more of your time and this time is best spent when you’re communicating with each other. Healthy communication in marriage requires HONESTY and TRANSPARENCY. The first married couple recorded in the Bible were naked and we’re convinced that wasn’t just to give us a picture of the physical nakedness required in marriage (although SEX is very important too). A healthy marriage requires emotional “nakedness.” It requires vulnerability. It means having NO SECRETS from each other. Talk about everything. Communication does for a marriage what breathing does for a body.
“Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.” Genesis 2:25
2. Support each other in everything.
Your spouse should never have to face any struggle without your full partnership, encouragement and support. It’s that simple. This means loving each other and respecting each other. It means working through disagreements with mutual respect striving to find a mutually-beneficial solution. It means facing EVERY challenge in marriage hand-in-hand and side-by-side.“So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” Ephesians 5:33
3. Build your marriage on a foundation of faith.
This one gets a little controversial, because our culture has tried to separate faith and love as two separate worlds that never need to intersect with each other. We’ve found that the happiest and healthiest couples are both committed to their faith and encourage one another in their faith. They’ve learned that the more they love God, the more capacity they’ll have to love each other. I’m fully convinced that every marriage is strongest when Christ is at the center of it.
“God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.” 1 John 4:16
4. Remove all Exit Strategies.
A “perfect marriage” is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other. The happiest and healthiest couples have removed the word “divorce” from their vocabularies. They don’t have any “exit strategies.” Their commitment to each other is always more important their their differences and flaws. The don’t know what life is going to throw their way, but they’ve already decided that whatever it may be, they will face it together and they won’t give up on each other. That kind of commitment is essentially what marriage is all about.
“Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” 1 Corinthians 13:7
For additional tools to help you build a stronger marriage, download “iVow: Secrets to a Stronger Marriage” straight to your iPhone or iPad by clicking here. You can also check out our new online program designed for struggling couples at: FightingForMyMarriage.com
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