7 Ways to Heal a Broken Marriage

3. Refuse to be rude.

This one sounds easy, but it might be the most difficult thing on the list. When we’re hurt, we have a short fuse and we’re often negative without even realizing it. If you want to change the negative tone in your marriage, but must first refuse to have a negative tone in your own words and actions towards your spouse. Be kind even when its not reciprocated. Be loving even when he/she is being unlovable. Be appreciative even when it’s not returned. Consistent kindness will chip away at even the hardest of hearts and promote healing in a marriage.

4. Take full responsibility for anything you’ve done to hurt your spouse (past and present).

Someone once said, “Being in love means never having to say you’re sorry.” That person has probably been divorced at least five times! The truth is that marriage requires a LOT of apologies. Genuine ones. If you say, “I’m sorry, BUT…” or “I’m sorry if you got your feelings hurt” or any apology that deflects responsibility or adds an excuse on the end, then you’re not really apologizing. Swallow your pride and apologize. It’s disarming and it paves the to healing. Say, “I’m truly sorry that I hurt you. I have no excuse for my actions. I was wrong. Please forgive me and allow me the opportunity to rebuild the trust I broke.”

When your spouse apologizes to you, say, “I forgive you. I’m letting go of my right to get even and choosing instead of pursue healing in this relationship. I won’t use this offense as ammunition in future disagreements. I love you. Let’s move forward.”

The next step goes against our instincts, but this is VITAL to success…