Ten Steps to Rebuilding TRUST in Marriage

3. Don’t retaliate.

When we’ve been wronged, we usually have an urge to punish the person who wronged us. Fight the temptation to use this past offense as future ammunition in arguments. Don’t keep holding it over his/her head. We want them to feel the pain that they have caused us, but this kind of thinking hurts everyone involved and damages trust even more. It’s been said, “Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and then hoping the other person dies!” When you’ve been wronged in a relationship, give clear and specific guidelines for how trust can be restored, but don’t punish the other person.