Why Jesus Didn’t Date

(The following conversation took place between my wife Cat and I whilst driving in our car.)

Me: Hey, so I’m thinking about doing a blog post exploring the idea of Jesus being fully man, but not having a sex drive.

Cat: Oh?

Me: Yeah. Because how can Jesus be fully man without a sex drive? And if he has a sex drive, then how can he be sinless, since Matthew 5:27-28, says, “Do not commit adultery. But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” What man doesn’t look at women lustfully?

Cat [looking out her side window]: Oh.

Me: What?

Cat: What?

Me: Don’t you think that’s interesting? That Jesus has to be sinless, yet, by his own definition, cannot be, since being fully man means he must regularly commit adultery? If Jesus was fully man, then must have lusted. And if he lusted, he wasn’t sinless. [In slightly manic tone.] That’s kind of interesting, don’t you think?

Cat: Not really.

Me: What? Of course it’s interesting. It’s core to the whole conception of Jesus being fully man!

Cat: Look. You don’t lust after your sister, right?

Me: Ew. No.

Cat: And you don’t lust after your mom. Because your mom and your sister aren’t potential mates for you. That’s how Jesus saw all women. There are no potential mates for Jesus. Just like no sane father can lust after his daughter, Jesus couldn’t lust after any woman. To Jesus, every woman is his daughter. Literally.

Me: So there’s no psychological mechanism for his lust to kick in.

Cat: Right. Plus, it would be cruel of Jesus to have sexual relations with a woman. He’s God. Not exactly an equal relationship. And he’s knows he’s not gonna marry anyone.

Me: Right.

Cat: And that’s how Jesus can be fully man and never lust.

Me: Oh. [Long pause.] Yeah, I probably would have reached that same conclusion. [Cat silently resumes gazing out window.] I would have. Really. I would have thought of that.

Cat [pensively, still looking out window]: I wonder if I should start my own blog?

Me: No! You shouldn’t!