Don’t Make Me Smack You With a Ruler in Public This Weekend

Last updated on: September 23, 2009 at 6:18 am By John Shore

This Saturday (September 25) I’ll be at the annual San Diego Christian Writers Guild’s writer’s conference, where I’ll be boring confusing infuriating inspiring writers via the class I’ll be teaching, “Surviving the Blog Clog.” (I’ll be doing that class twice: first at 11 a.m., and then again at 2 p.m. I’ll also be at the Friday night, pre-conference meet-and-greet. You can see all the classes and workshops being offered on the conference’s schedule.) Throughout Saturday I’ll also be available for... Read more

Bestselling Author Jacquelyn Mitchard Now Judging My 10-Word Short Story Contest! Prize Now Includes Her New Book!

Last updated on: September 22, 2009 at 9:00 am By John Shore

When first I beheld the veritable flood of entries pouring in for my First Annual John Shore 10-Word Short Story Contest,I couldn’t help but reflect upon how next year I’m going to allow only five stories per writer. Nathan. (more…) Read more

Announcing The First Annual John Shore 10-Word Short Story Contest

Last updated on: September 20, 2009 at 8:12 am By John Shore

[Update: Bestselling author Jacquelyn Mitchard is now helping to judge this contest.] Recently I spotted this for-sale ad on Craigslist: “Nike Triax c3 heart rate monitor and watch, used one time only.” Which of course brought to mind Hemingway’s famous six-word story, “For sale: baby shoes, never worn.” Thinking I can’t be the only person who digs this sort of novel-in-a-nutshell, I am now herein and forthwith announcing The First Annual John Shore 10-Word Short Story Contest. The rules to... Read more

Quotable Me

Last updated on: September 18, 2009 at 7:31 pm By John Shore

Last week someone told me they were going to put something I wrote in the “Favorite Quotations” part of their Facebook profile. “You’ll be right there between Rumi and Wayne Dyer!” enthused this FB-buddy. Who doesn’t like to be quoted? Not I. Then, two days ago, I thought, “Hey: I know! I’ll try Twittering again (I tried last year, and kind of hated it)—only this time I’ll make the whole point of my tweets to be Totally Quotable Quotes!” So... Read more

Helping Christians be Bored by Homosexuality Since 2007

Last updated on: June 26, 2015 at 10:59 pm By John Shore

A conservative Christian emailed me yesterday to share his idea that I should “back off from writing about the gays so much.” So I did the only thing I could do. I had him killed. Hey, you’ve got your friends. I’ve got mine. That’s all I’m saying. No, but this quarrelsome query (oh, that Daniel Webster! what a gay lexicographer he was!) was prompted by my recent post, Nothing Says Love Like a Lesbian Christian Minister with an Oven, in... Read more

The universal value of Shore hardness

Last updated on: September 15, 2009 at 12:08 pm By John Shore

What can I say? It's in my genes. Read more

Nothing Says Lovin’ Like a Lesbian Minister With an Oven

Last updated on: September 12, 2009 at 12:55 pm By John Shore

Speaking generally there are two kinds of Christians: Those who believe homosexuality is an affront to God, and those who don’t. Speaking personally there are, to me, two other kinds of Christians: those who bake and mail me cookies, and those who don’t. The only Christian who last week happened to bake and mail me cookies was Anita Cadonau-Huseby. I’ve never met Anita; I do know she follows my blog. After reading my recent posts, Question of the Week: Does... Read more

It’s a Necessarily Horrible Early-19th C. Hand-Cranked Skull Saw!

Last updated on: September 11, 2009 at 5:07 am By John Shore

In the astonishingly competitive contest that yesterday raged across the internet as thousands hundreds tens of readers furiously vying for a free autographed copy of my book I’m OK–You’re Not hurt their heads trying to guess what this thing is even though after a while I could see nobody was ever going to get it so finally I had to post as a clue this thing which amazingly enough didn’t seem to help anyone at all until I finally just... Read more

The Big Clue to Yesterday’s Mystery Thing

Last updated on: September 10, 2009 at 2:08 pm By John Shore

We’ve laughed. We’ve cried. We’ve bonded. We’ve been disturbed by a mental image of Martin’s wife. You know, when I take a moment to reflect back on all the deep and rewarding times we’ve …. Okay, fine! Here’s the clue that shouldn’t fail you to the Mystery Thing that yesterday I made you guess at: Read more

Guess What This Thing Is and Win An Inscribed, Autographed Book!

Last updated on: September 9, 2009 at 11:13 am By John Shore

If you are the first to correctly guess what the above Mystery Thingamajig is I will send you, free of charge, autographed by me and personally inscribed to you, a first edition copy of my critically acclaimed, earth-shattering, world famous book of which I have two boxes in my garage, entitled “I’m OK—You’re Not: The Message We’re Sending Nonbelievers And Why We Should Stop.” Good luck! And remember: Friends don’t let friends try to brush their teeth with one of... Read more