Living In Fear Is Exhausting

Living in fear is exhausting.

I’ve spent too much of my life being afraid.

Driven by it.

Paralyzed by it.

Smothered by it.

I’m seeing fear for what it really is.

A joy stealer.

A manipulation tool.

If someone can make me afraid?

Of anything and everything on the outside?

They’ve gained control.

Doesn’t matter if they’ve sucked the life right out of me.

As long as they have control.

I thought for years that the fear was my fault.

That it was coming from inside of me.

A demon.

Or maybe just who I was at my core.

A fearful, crazy, woman.

Now I am seeing it.

The fear was coming from others.

People who were trying desperately to control me.

Why?

Well, because they were afraid.

They were taught by fear.

They lived in a state of fear.

Controlled by it as well.

And maybe it works for a minute.

We behave and do what we are told.

Maybe.

For a minute.

Until it doesn’t.

Funny thing is…

We are being told to “not fear.”

Taught with fear to not fear.

God doesn’t want you to fear.

So then…

Why am I so afraid?

Why am I being taught to fear everything?

Why are we trying to drive out fear with fear?

Nothing makes sense.

Except…

Well…

Love.

Perfect love drives out fear.

Fear doesn’t drive out fear.

Love does.

Am I gonna live my life in fear?

Or in love?

What will this day look like?

Will it be driven by fear?

Or love?

If you are peddling fear today…

I’m not buying it.

There is so much in this world to be afraid of.

I get that.

That’s where the power of the Holy Spirit comes in.

To us lead us in love.

To calm our fears.

To rescue us from the fear.

To rescue us from the people who try to control us by fear.

Deep breath.

What are we being driven by today?

Fear or love?

Let’s choose love.

Karen R Shock resides in Fort Wayne, IN with her husband and their youngest son. She had three more children who are married, four beautiful grandchildren and one on the way. Oh, and a dog name JT Barrett (Go Bucks). She is a retired homeschool mom, high school teacher and cheer coach. Life is hard, but fun. So here we are… Learning to lean into the mess, find rest in today, and maybe even make some new friends along the way.