Jesus, Zeus, Persephone—and Fairies

Jesus, Zeus, Persephone—and Fairies April 15, 2014

“Mommy, what god to you believe in?” Sally asked me recently.

“I don’t believe in any god, honey,” I told her.

“But mom, you’re supposed to believe in a god!” Sally responded.

“Uh, no, actually, people can choose what they want to believe,” I said. “Who told you that you’re supposed to believe in a god?” I asked.

“No one,” she said. “I just knewed it.”

“Well okay, what god do you believe in?” I asked.

“Lots of them,” she told me. “I believe in Jesus, and Zeus, and Persephone.”

“Oh,” I said. “Well, people believe in many different sorts of gods. Some people believe in one god, some believe in many gods, and some don’t believe in any gods. I don’t believe in any gods. You can choose to believe what you want, and you can even change your mind over time. I’ve changed my mind before.”

“Okay,” Sally replied, seeming unconcerned. “Well, I believe in many gods. I like Persephone the best.”

“Just don’t let anyone else tell you what you have to believe,” I told her. “You get to choose that yourself.”

“Okay, mom,” she replied, clearly growing bored with the conversation.

—————

When I was a child I read a book about a little boy who built fairy houses in his backyard, and fairies came and lived in them. I had been taught very firmly that the only supernatural beings were God and his angels and Satan and his demons, and I definitely didn’t believe in fairies, but I liked the idea. I spent many hours building little houses out of twigs, leaves, moss, and pebbles.

When I recently introduced this concept to Sally. She was ecstatic.

“Let’s build two, mommy!” she exclaimed as we gathered twigs. “Then fairies can come and live in them and they can be neighbors!”

“Okay,” I said. “Let’s gather some of this bark too.”

“Mommy, when you were a kid, and you built fairy houses, did you ever see a fairy?”

And that’s when I realized that Sally actually believes in fairies.

“Mommy, how big are fairies? Are they small, or big?”

“Well, that depends on how big your imagination is,” I told her with a smile.

—————

I like to see Sally using her imagination and exploring various beliefs and ideas, including both religious and folk traditions. I like to see her world wide open rather than tight closed. But I also know that as she grows she may ultimately choose a religious tradition. She is likely to give up her belief in fairies, Zeus, and Persephone, but she may ultimately keep her belief in Jesus. Or, she may not. She may not believe in any deities, or she may convert to Judaism or Islam, or practice Wicca or another religious or spiritual tradition. And that’s okay.

When I was pregnant with Sally, I met an atheist couple with two children. As a college student, I’d known atheists, but not a family. At the time, I was conflicted about what I myself believed. Knowing this family allowed me to relax. These friendly, kind family people were atheists. They lived normal lives and had normal concerns—they had legos and children’s books, children’s drawings and a cat, and they cooked us a homemade dinner. I was going to be okay.

But the couple’s seven-year-old son, Vincent, was not an atheist. He believed in the Roman gods. All of them. And you know what? His parents were fine with that. They were honest about what they believed—or rather, what they didn’t believe—but they didn’t tell Vincent what he could or could not believe, and they encouraged his curiosity and his exploration of a variety of religious traditions. Coming from my own evangelical background, with parents who told us what to believe and wouldn’t have accepted anything else from us. Looking back, I think seeing this was crucial.

Sally’s world is currently filled with a wide range of ideas and entities. When I read aloud to her, she has a hard time differentiating fact from fiction. I love seeing her explore and try out different ideas. As she grows, she may give up some beliefs and fix on others.

My job is not to tell Sally what to believe, but I suppose that’s easy to say when she places Persephone in the same category as Jesus and also believes in fairies. Will it be so easy if she formally converts to Christianity in high school, is baptized and begins attending church? I understand why my parents sought so hard to ensure that I would believe as they, I really do. They believed they were right, and that their beliefs resulted in the best outcomes in the present and the future. Adopting that same view is tempting, but I can’t do that, I won’t do that.

Like with other areas of her life, my job is to support her freedom to make her own choices and to ensure that she has the tools she needs to make these choices healthily. I have more thoughts, and more things I’m still thinking through, but those will have to wait for future posts.


Browse Our Archives