This may well be another of those faux Pearl letters just written to make a point. The letter writer says that if a man has lust problems, that they are his problems. A βministry supporterβ claims that itβs everyone elses responsibility to make sure men arenβt tempted with the penis-demon.
For well over a year weβve been running a second Answering βPreparing To Be A Help Meetβ on Sundays, filled with questions by young ladies trying to get ready for marriage. Since weβve run through many of the questions on their site itβs time to shift Sundays to something else, like perhaps examining the cornucopia of probably fake emails and questions that Michael and Debi Pearl of No Greater Joy post on their website and the possibly poisonous answers they give.
Question and answer here.
Dear Debi,
I have truly enjoyed your book Created to Be His Help Meet. It has been a blessing to me and many of my friends. I have given it to many ladies, and some have questions about the way you put things. Some ladies take exception to the story of the lady who wears the tight skirt and the manβs reaction. They say, βShe makes it sound like Lydia (Bathsheba) is responsible for his actions. Why didnβt the young man go for counselling? I donβt believe a normal young man has a constant, day to day sexual struggle against visual temptation. They donβt have to regardless of how a girl is dressed. This sounds too much like, βIf you dress like that, you are just asking to be raped.β
and the answer supposedly written not by Michael or Debi Pearl but by βa friend of the ministryβ that sounds suspiciously like Debi:
I tell my boys about the dangers of a woman who dresses like βLydia.β My son, 6 years old, sees women in public and observes how they dress. βDaddy, is that a βstrange ladyβ?β Heβs referring to the βstrange womanβ of Proverbs 7. I answer, βI donβt know if she is, but she certainly dresses like one.β And we have seen them at βchurch.β Do you want my son to look at you and think of you as a βstrange ladyβ? How about your daughter, would my sons think she is strange? My sons wonβt marry a woman who doesnβt respect a manβs propensity to visual temptation. Theyβll marry a woman who reveals herself to them and them only.
My daughters wonβt dress like a strange woman either. Mine, at only 9 years old, knows that she should keep her body from a manβs eyes, reserving it for her future husband. In the grocery store one day, when my daughter was wearing a skirt that flowed around her ankles, she heard another little girl (dressed in shorts) point to my daughter and comment to her own mother, βLook, Mom, sheβs beautiful!β Why not dress beautifully rather than like a slut? You should get out of your ignorance before your dinner guest looks at you or your daughter then visits the bathroom. Well, thatβs probably already happened.
So charming that a so-called Christian is calling women who do not dress to their standard a βslutβ. I would love to see that word made as socially unacceptable as the βnβ word.
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