No Longer Quivering
by Robin Jennifer at Lori Alexander’s The Transformed Wife – To the Warrior Wives of Straying Husbands
Editor’s note: I guess there are only so many ways that Lori can state that feminists are evil, modesty is important and you are not allowed to have needs, so now she’s relying a couple of times a week on guest writers. Now it’s being pushed that you must stay with a cheating spouse and pray for him? This is another one of those issues that is deeply personal, like birth control, or working, that might work for some individuals but not for everyone.
In my years in the Evangelical world I’ve observed only slight success among marriages where the man cheats. Even if the woman stays and does all the things this writer suggests most of the cases I’ve seen involve the man becoming increasingly verbally abusive until he leaves for the other woman. Has this method ever worked for anyone you’ve known? This, for me, for many others, is too much of a violation of trust to be able to smile, pray and automatically forgive.
I just want to encourage any wife who is standing for her marriage in the face of infidelity. Personally, I know the pain, as this is why I divorced my first husband twenty-three years ago, (and at the time, in my ignorance, I felt completely justified). He went on to marry The Other Woman (or the “strange” woman, as the Bible calls them) after our divorce was final; I may never know if he may have chosen differently had I chosen to stand in faith for our marriage restoration. The LORD has redeemed the years that the locust ate, in many ways, yet my adult son still suffers from our choices.
Ladies, if you are standing for your marriage, trusting the LORD to use you to be a minister of reconciliation, may I offer suggestions for what NOT to do, and what TO do, as you stand:
Resist insecurity
Tame your tongue
Bless your husband whenever possible
Be encouraged, Warrior Wives of straying husbands. The LORD is your Salvation as you war in rescuing strength for your husband’s salvation! The LORD is your Helper (John 14:26) to contain your thoughts and tongue, teaching you all things as you wisely navigate these waters. The LORD is your graceful Source of LIFE and blessing, giving sweet and Living Water flowing out of you toward your husband, and even the other woman, as a minister of reconciliation!
QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders, cultural enforcers and those that seek to keep women submitted to men and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull and Spiritual Abuse honestly and thoughtfully.
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