Expectations in Marriage are Fear-Based?

Expectations in Marriage are Fear-Based? July 24, 2018

My husband and I love walking on the beach. But I don’t think about spanking everyone in a thong like Lori Alexander does.

Yes, we’re back here again, expections and marriage. But for a change we’re not hearing from Lori Alexander at The Transformed Wife but from April Cassidy of The Peaceful Wife. There are those that will tell you that Lori and April are the same person writing for two different blogs, but I don’t think so. Lori uses more demeaning language and blaming that April. But their theology is very similiar, they both believe having expectations in marriage are bad. April says that expectations in marriage are fear-based. So much of Quiverfull Evangelicalism is fear based, not just the marriages.

Last night right before bedtime I wrote a few short words in my personal blog about marriage Lori style and what I’ve found works for me. I don’t have piles of expectations, but I do have things I require, basic things like respect, love and mercy. The ability to not be joined at the hip, realization that we’ve both different with different needs and that’s okay. One of the things we have that I’ve never seen mentioned in Fundytown that helps have a great marriage is not taking yourself too seriously, a sense of humor.

On to The Peaceful Wife’s list of wrong expectations.

Wow, a sliding scale of badness. Sounds like she thinks women go into marriage with the expectation that every husband is a perfect automaton, not a fully functioning and flawed real human being.

April has written a marriage book, and I’ll be reviewing it for NLQ, as kind of a counterpoint to the crazy hot mess of Lori Alexander’s The Power of the Transformed Wife.

Her book cannot possibly be as toxic as Lori’s. I don’t think that April and Lori are one in the same. However I do think that Lori has been following April and is heavily influenced by her. Expect to see more from April in the coming months.


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