I hate having to post about Lori Alexander of The Transformed Wife so often. But she has turned into the foremost purveyor of the most ridiculous ideas, toxic tropes and twisted theology that has a body count. Today she spoke at her blog about the issues of consent in marital sexual relations. Lori is not a big fan of consent.
Lately in the chatroom Lori has been on a binge about spousal rape. She thinks women that cry rape in marriage are doing it merely because they didnβt feel like sex, as a revenge thing. A petty piffling punishment against their husbands. Lori claims it only happens in marriages where there is other abuse ongoing at the same time.
Wait a minute there! Rape at its core involves consent. One partner consenting to have sex with the other partner. It does not matter if they are married, living together, a date, a bar pick up or strangers. Consent matters! Itβs really the only thing that matters in all of these relationships.
No one, male or female, owes anyone else sex. If youβre married hopefully youβll want to take care of your partnerβs needs more often than not. But you must consent! Consent is the law.
Not according to Lori:
There are more screen caps of ladies attempting to reason with Lori over this issue of consent. The names are blanked out except for Loriβs. Jesus wept.
A few statistics on marital rape from RAINN β Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network
- Fourteen percent of married women report they were raped by their spouse. This percentage probably underestimates the true prevalence of marital rape. (Russell)
- Of reporting women, 23 percent reported rape and sexual assault as the only abuse in the marriage. (Russell)
- As with rapists in general, the marital rapist is not a βcrazed sex fiend.β He is generally a man who sees sex as a solution to all marital problems, as well as the source of validation for masculine identity.
- Marital rape is not always a part of battered womenβs syndrome. However, at least half of all battered women are also survivors of marital rape. (Russell)
- Adult female survivors of marital rape are in a higher percentage bracket to have been sexually molested as children. (Lystad, Frieze, Russell)
- A national survey found 10 percent of all sexual assault cases reported by women involved a husband or ex-husband attacker. (Rape in America, 1992, National Victim Center)
- Under at least one section of the sexual offense codes (usually those code sections regarding force) marital rape is a crime in all 50 states.
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