Someone recently asked me who my blog readers are. It seems like many of them fall into two categories: those who’ve been wounded by the church and leaders of small/mid-sized churches. I told the person asking that I didn’t think the two groups were all that different from one another in some core ways. The people in both groups love Jesus. They care at some level about what is happening in the Body of Christ. And each group is looking... Read more
When I tell people I’ve just met I’ve written a book about regret, many of them have an account of something from their past haunting them to share with me. New acquaintances aren’t prone to share their deepest, personal painful stories of regret unless they are sorely lacking any sort of social filter. I’ve been surprised by how many people have stories ready to share about one particular era of their lives. They’re stories about their high school years. “I... Read more
Our townhome community is situated next to a set of railroad tracks and a graveyard, which sounds worse than it is. I rarely notice the low rumble of freight rolling past us anymore. And our neighbors at Evergreen Cemetery, have become some of my favorite people in town to visit. Their stories are captured in a few chiseled letters on silent gray stone: a name, dates, perhaps a Bible verse or a few words. Long lives. Brief ones. Each one... Read more
What do those in the second half of their lives tell the big “C” Church about the kind of faith that endures? I’d like to suggest that those at midlife and beyond have something important to teach all of us about “marathon faith”: And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. (Hebrews 12:1-2) While many of us may know a wise older person who serves... Read more
The conversation turned to regret, as it sometimes does when two middle-aged women are sharing stories of their lives over lunch. A good friend introduced her good friend Libby Buchanan to me, telling me that Libby had a story to share, and was in the process of writing a book about it. Libby does indeed have a story to share. Libby is a survivor of the child pornography industry. She’s now an experienced Bible teacher who has penned a manuscript... Read more
I worked as a paid caregiver for two years. I ran errands, shopped, prepared meals, organized a few closets and pantries, did some housecleaning and provided companionship for some elderly clients trying to stave off checking themselves in to a care facility. All showed me something of the fragility of life, especially as our aging bodies begin to act in ways that our will never intended. 93 year-old Mrs. H, who I visited twice-weekly for nearly a year, showed me... Read more
When I talk about money with others, the conversations tend to head in one of two directions: either toward Dave Ramsey-type personal finance issues or toward anxiety-tinged discussions of general economic trends, like dim job prospects for recent grads or the real estate meltdown. The conversation I wish I were having a little more frequently with others is the kind of conversation Caryn Rivadeneira is having with readers in her newest book, Broke: What Financial Desperation Revealed About God’s Abundance. “When... Read more
Even when the truth comes out about a spiritual leader’s secret life, the kinds of lawyered-up semi-confessions that they and their team use to respond to their victims, congregants and the general public seem to be missing a key element: true regret. Leaders like Doug Phillips or Bill Gothard engineer almost-apologies. As I’ve followed these cases over the last year or so, it strikes me that those apologies are loaded with exit-clause “buts” as a way to leave wiggle room for... Read more
Professor Diane Leclerc of Northwest Nazarene University has a piece up on the Christianity Today website called “The Good News About Bad Churches”. In it, she asks, “How, then, do we explain the seeming contradiction between what we believe about the church and what we experience in the church? Is it wishful thinking to proclaim the church holy? Are pain and heartache just inevitable?” She goes on to express the tension that exists between that grateful, forgiven kingdom behavior that should reflect who we... Read more
During his visit to Asia last week, a group of Malaysian school kids asked President Obama about his greatest regret. “I regret not having spent more time with my mother,” Obama candidly told the students when asked about his life regrets. “Because she died early – she got cancer right around when she was my age, actually, she was just a year older than I am now – she died. It happened very fast, in about six months.” Ann Dunham... Read more
Pilgrim's Road Trip
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