Reductionism, Ridicule and Red Herrings

See if you can spot the Reductionism, Ridicule and Red Herrings in these paragraphs and when you see how inane the argument is you may therefore spot how inane most of the atheist’s arguments are.

What is this strange activity that millions take part in on Monday nights in America. Monday nights? Indeed, the same bewildering behavior takes place across the country for a good part of the year on Friday nights, and if you look closely you will see that our young men are engaged in this strange and dangerous and ridiculous thing called ‘sport’ almost every day.

This is what happens: First they kill a pig and skin it, cut the skin into pieces and sew them together. Then they insert a rubber bladder into it’s middle and inflate it. This is called the “football.” And then a dozen or so grown men will put on tight pants, body armor and devise complicated ‘plays’ in order to move the football down the field and get it across a line and score a “goal.” Then another man in tight pants will run out while everyone cheers and he has to kick the football through two upright poles and win another “point” for his team.

Americans invest millions and millions of dollars in this ridiculous activity each year. They build huge stadiums, raise enormous amounts of money and flock to watch overpaid, under intelligent oafs chase an inflated piece of pig skin around a field for a couple of hours. Furthermore, this is just one such “sport”. Millions of others spend even more money to watch grown men in short pants run around after another ball trying to get it into a freestanding net while intentionally using nothing but their feet to maneuver the ball. Then–just when they might get the ball into the net they allow the opposing team to place a man there called the “goalie” who is allowed to use his hands to stop them putting the ball into the net–which was what they were all trying to do in the first place. How ridiculous is that?

I could go on and discuss the teams who try to put balls through hoops with nets attached that are intentionally placed nine feet off the ground to make the task difficult–and to make matters worse these player–for some reason inscrutable to everyone else–may not run with the ball unless they are bouncing it on the ground. I will leave the discussion of the absurd sport of ice hockey–not to mention motor racing to others who share my amazement at the stupidity and gullibility of millions of human beings.

Think for a moment about the huge amount of money they organizers of sport are making. These rich men in back rooms devise yet more rules and regulations for their gullible followers to abide by. Their wickedness is only exceeded by the stupidity of the millions of people who willingly go along with them–spending millions on tickets and paraphernalia for their team. Go to a football game and witness the hungry hoards swallowing the falsely manufactured ‘team spirit’ buying shirts and hats and tacky trinkets and over priced souvenirs of all kinds.

Think of all the extravagant extras that surround this activity called “sport”. On the sidelines they have scanty clad females called “cheerleaders”. These are clearly sexually abused females who are forced to exhibit themselves and dance in provocative ways for money. They become the role models for the young girls involved in sport–and are clearly the sexual prizes for those who win.

Fans of sport will tell me I don’t understand sport, that I haven’t really taken the time to appreciate its subtlety, its finesse, the fine qualities it produces in the participants. They are right. I don’t understand. I don’t need to. I can see instantly how stupid and ridiculous it all is. It is no more than a group of grown men or women wearing ridiculous clothes in public running about and fighting over an inflated piece of pigskin.

Or you could take sport seriously as a noble and ancient part of being human.