I hate being naked. Without being arrogant, I know that I am an attractive human being…well at least on my good days I do. To quote the movie The Butterfly Effect, “I guess charisma and eyeliner go a long way.” Ashton Kutcher character was referring to his Goth influenced/hefty sized roommate played by Ethan Suplee who seemed to be able to hook up with any hot girl he wanted to. Though I don’t wear eyeliner these days, and I don’t hook up with random attractive people anymore…the charismatic part I still relate too.
With that all being said I still hate being naked; correction, I hate seeing myself naked. The mirror at times will evolve into an instrument of destruction if I am not careful. I see all of my imperfections; the zits that I was lied to about saying that they would disappear after I became an adult, my freakishly pale Irish skin that boils like a lobster if in the sun to long, and my “wobbly parts”…oh you got love the wobbly parts. For the freakishly small percent of the world that doesn’t know what “wobbly parts” are please let me enlighten you; these are the “extra” parts of yourself that wobble when walk or in my case they simply wobble when I breathe. When I am the most critical of myself I see all the things that I hate about myself…especially the wobbly parts.
My beloved and partner in life Stephanie, gets so frustrated with me when I get in the place where I only see what’s wrong with myself which tends to be when I stuck in bed with an exhausting/painful flair up of my fibromyalgia. Stephanie never tells me that I am stuck in a one-person pity party, but instead begs me to be gentle with myself and too never stop throwing punches in the battle to love myself.
I know I’ve been silent more often than not here on Patheos and so much appreciate the patience of my editors in allowing me to figure out whatever I am going through, but I am here to say that I can no longer be silent. There are some amazing things on the horizon for me and I invite whoever wants to be apart of it to journey with me as we fight this battle together of learning to love ourselves.
So…I guess this is my first punch that I am throwing publicly in the battle to love myself and too encourage others to not stop fighting in the battle to love themselves as well. If I am not alone in hating what I see when I stand in front the mirror naked please feel free to let me know either in the comment section below or you can hit me up on twitter by clicking here. Maybe, just maybe we can learn to love our reflections together…even the wobbly parts.