Unfiltered Ramblings

You know you’re really tired when the idea of two days in the hospital sounds like a vacation. I told the Ogre this morning that “it’ll be just like I’m at a spa, only with someone mashing on my stomach every half-hour!” He laughed, and then when I sat down and started typing he said, “you realize that you’re going to owe your readers a giant apology after you have the baby, right?” I was confused, so I said, “huh? I’m confused.” He said, “after the baby is born, I’m going to make you read back over your blog posts from the last two months. You’ve basically been using your blog as a vehicle to complain.”

Since Charlotte basically refused to sleep last night and my brain is therefore working about as well as the Tin-Man after a hurricane, I’m going to take him at his word, apologize, and then write about something other than how uncomfortable I am. (But rest assured, I’m unbelievably uncomfortable.)

I apologize for complaining at you.

Now, wanna see something AMAZING?

Photo courtesy of the Associated Press

It’s Joe Biden being massively inappropriate! No shock there, but look at the expression on the two biker dudes’ faces! This is seriously gold. It makes me so happy. It’s the best picture I’ve ever seen. I actually think that the last four years of the most bumbling VP ever were totally worth it just to have this photographic keepsake.

In other politically-oriented news, you know who’s a complete nutcase? Ron Paul. I know people who are big Ron Paul supporters, and actually I was a big Ron Paul supporter four years ago when I was also a heartless monster, but I’m no longer a heartless monster, thus I cannot support Ron Paul.

How is the above paragraph logical, you may be asking? It’s probably not, but let me explain my non-linear thinking on Ron Paul.

Ron Paul is a non-interventionist. I get the non-interventionist policy from a purely political standpoint. If you are concerned primarily with the welfare of Americans and America, then Ron Paul’s policies make a lot of sense.

If, however, unlike the Tin Man, you actually have a heart, Ron Paul is as scary as Mayor Wilkins at a Sunday picnic.

I eat souls for breakfast!

Non-interventionist policies are just something I can’t get behind, because they completely ignore the lives of, like, the rest of humanity.

Non-interventionists say stuff like “FDR staged Pearl Harbor as an excuse to get into the war” and I’m like, “actually, it would have been nice if he had gotten into the war because millions of people were being slaughtered in gas chambers instead of waiting until it effected Americans.” (I have never learned the difference between affect and effect, so please feel free to correct me in the handy combox below. I promise to write a sarcastic blog post about it later this week.)

You know what I mean? I just think that as Americans, and as human beings, we should care about the welfare of people other than those who had the good fortune to be born with red, white and blue blood. I think that ignoring all the other humans on earth is a terrible thing to do. But then, this is why I don’t write about politics often, because comparing Ron Paul to a demon-changeling uber-hygenic Mayor in a mythical television series isn’t exactly the most watertight of political arguments.

If you want an awesome political post, go read this post by Frank Weathers. I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately, and it seems to me that it’s pretty much impossible to be a Ron Paul supporter and a Catholic. After all, as Catholics, we are called to lay down our lives for others, and Ron Paul’s non-interventionist policies are basically the exact opposite of that. I realize, objectively, that you can’t build a successful country on the policy “lay down your lives for others”, so I can understand American Catholics holding onto Catholicism with one hand and America with the other. Still, though, there has to be some cognitive dissonance there, right? Myself, I’m more comfortable holding onto Catholicism with both hands and checking the ballot box next to the candidate who gets the closest to that.

I mean, that’s what I do during election cycles when I’m feeling mature and responsible. This election cycle, not so much. This election cycle, I’m voting Romney, because Paul Ryan is a total dreamboat.

Really really. After the glorious biker photo, I’ll be a little sad to see Joe go, but four years of eye candy is something that American housewives have been bereft of for far too long. Paul Ryan FTW!

Speaking of eye candy, this would absolutely be a winning ticket:


Are you totally impressed yet with the thoughtful and erudite blog posts that come out of my brain when I stop navel-gazing about pregnancy and children? No? No?

Fine, then.

See you tomorrow! I’m going to try not to complain for two days in a row, thus shattering my personal best of not complaining for 1.3 hours in a row. So you can look forward to more nonsensical ramblings about things I’m not even remotely qualified to talk about. Lucky you!

  • Francisco

    I enjoy your blog and I don’t mean to pick a fight, but here’s a good defense of non-interventionism:


    I guess I agree in principle that it would be good for the US government to interfere in certain situations. I just don’t trust them to make the right choices ever.

    • calahalexander

      I haven’t watched the video, but I agree 100% about your last statement. The reason I chose the WWII example is because it was so clearly a case where we needed to interfere. Where everyone needed to interfere. Much murkier are recent wars, and whether or not the reasons for them are legitimate. I honestly can’t say one way or the other, as I feel that we don’t have enough unbiased information. That’s one of the reasons I don’t blog about politics…I don’t trust that I have the full story on pretty much anything.

  • Larry

    I hope you’re joking about Paul Ryan being your reason for voting for Romney. Do you advocate the US going to war in every country where people are being mistreated? Do you advocate other countries attacking us for the mistreatment of humans that happens here?

    • calahalexander

      I’m not joking about Paul Ryan. I always make important decisions like this based on who’s the hottest. And yes, I absolutely advocated endless wars based on all perceived mistreatement, no matter how legitimate. Also, I genuinely think that little boys should ride unicorn bicycles, and I sincerely hope that Captain America and Iron Man run for office.

      • Theresa

        Where is the “like” button!?!?! HAHA :)

  • Jay C

    Cannot agree with you more Calah!

    And, as usual, thanks for the smile of the day!!

  • http://www.throwthemout.com John Galt

    The problem with you philosophy is the same with all Fascist-Socialist philosophies… for the good of all (and the children, of course), you want to use the government to steal our money and our kids to go off and fight your war.

    If you want to help someone in another country… fine… YOU GO DO IT! Or get all your friends together and go help those people. But don’t hide behind the government and ask them to bully us and force us all into doing something we may not want to do.

    Put your money (and your life) where your mouth is. The war recruiters are expecting you to show up to enlist today, ok?

    • http://a-star-of-hope.blogspot.com JoAnna

      You do realize that she’s 9 months pregnant, right?

      • calahalexander

        Yeah, I’m pretty sure the war recruiters would be like, “Um, thanks, but no thanks.” Even if I said, “But this guy on the internet said you were expecting me!”

  • Josh

    Haha. As I was reading the post, I thought “I bet someone already called her a fascist in the combox.”
    @John Galt, et al. – Being an “interventionist” doesn’t mean you are for the invasion of all countries in which people need help, i.e., every country, including America. It certainly doesn’t necessarily make you a Fascist.
    @ Calah, et al. – Ron Paul is not a complete isolationist and your characterization of “the Paul position” seems as black-and-white-only-no-gray as John Galt’s characterization of your position.
    I often wonder if there is a domestic corollary to the foreign policy intervention debates. I honestly don’t know if this works, but isn’t welfare, food stamps, etc., caring about people other than those who have the good fortune to be financially stable? It seems to me we have a pretty interventionist foreign policy and very interventionist domestic policy these days. I’m generally for intervention on principle, I just think governments, especially ours, do a poor job at “helping,” whether domestically or abroad, and should only be used when there are no other options.

    • calahalexander

      Hey, Josh, thanks for leaving a sensible, calm and well-thought out reply. I really appreciate that. And I tend to agree with pretty much everything you said, although I was under the impression that Ron Paul was a strict isolationist. But maybe I’m wrong on that? I’m not a political blogger, and the warm and fuzzy commenters telling me to get my sorry ass shot off are the primary reason why. Charming, lovely people. Also, thanks for the affect/effect trick! That’s pretty neat. I’ll try to remember it.

      • Josh

        I was working from the assumption that “interventionism” included foreign war (which RP does support in limited circumstances, e.g., pre-occupation phase Afghanistan) but I reread the section and I see you were probably talking about humanitarian, no-direct-US-interest intervention, in which case you’re right–he’s a strict isolationist. But if I can risk a little pedantry here, there’s a distinction that is sometimes missed: RP is for fighting bad guys and helping others achieve freedom if it’s voluntary. He’s against coercing everyone to pay for (and some to die for) whatever excursion those currently in power say is necessary to fight bad guys and help others achieve freedom. I’m not sure which side I fall on, but I do see the difference and I think it is a fair distinction to make in light of our undeniable history of supporting some monsters because it “furthered our interests.” Of course, it’s not all bad. We’ve done good too. Like all human endeavors, it’s a mixed bag. OK, I’m getting into “unfiltered ramblings,” so I’ll stop.

  • Josh

    Also, being someone who also confuses “affect” and “effect,” here’s my tip: “effect” means to bring something about, and this usually requires effort. EFFect = EFFort. “Affect” usually means to influence something. People who are affable are usually better at influencing others. AFFect = AFFable.

  • Kerri

    Oh Calah, I plan on staring into Paul Ryan’s beautiful baby blues for the next 16 years as VP then Pres!! Good luck on breaking your non- complaining record.Some days 1.3 hours would be a record around here too but more from my kids or husband than me.

  • Donn

    As a person that spent time serving in combat to (so called) protect your sorry ass and bring freedom to you and the country we are occupying, it’s time you go. When you come home tell me exactly how many people here and the country of occupation actually care. Go get your sorry ass shot off then you can come home and write a sorry blog like this. Just remember, where the military goes so does distruction and death. Not a few, but a lot of innocent people die. When we leave they hate us and how can you blame them.

    • http://a-star-of-hope.blogspot.com JoAnna

      You’re telling a pregnant woman to go and “get her sorry ass shot off”? Seriously? I hope you’re not under the mistaken impression that you’re a Christian after a comment like that.

    • Ginny

      Hey. Hey Donn with too many “n”s in your name. Also in the military, here. Just got back from a little place called “Japan”. Ever heard of it? There was a war there that we fought this one time. And we’re still there. And guess what? They rather liked that we were there to help when their country went to pot due to a massive earthquake, tsunami and nuclear disaster. Sorry you are an 18-year-old liberal and/or Ron Paul supporter whose only choice was to enlist and now blame all your problems on the military and/or the government. Please.

  • Jessica

    Honestly, if I were you I’d stick with complaining. It doesn’t generate as nasty of a lashback in the combox.
    Besides, even your complaining is hilarious. At least, it is to fellow massively pregnant women, who can empathize oh so well. When I read your blog, my husband often wants to know why I’m snorting with laughter. And I’m like “THIS! This is SO TRUE!! See honey, I’m not the only one!”

    • calahalexander

      Jessica, yeah, I’m thinking you’re right. I’m just wondering why all this nastiness is being unleashed here, on what is obviously not a seriously political post. For God’s sake, I ended it with a picture of a kid riding a unicorn bike! Hello, people, if you want to lash out, go to a legitimately political blog, not the blog of some pregnant chick who passes her time by rambling at the internet. Gah.

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