The 4 most important parts of a marriage

couple driving

As a pastor and author on marriage issues, I’m often asked, “What does it take to make a great marriage?

It’s a great question, and while there’s no shortcut to building a solid, lifelong relationship, the recipe is simpler than we might think. I’m going to take EVERYTHING I’ve learned about marriage from my years of research and ministry and boil it down into the simplest description possible. Here’s what it takes to have a great marriage…

[Read more...]

A prayer for my marriage

woman praying

I believe in the power of prayer. One of the simplest ways you can invest into your marriage is by praying with and for your spouse. God uses our prayers to change our circumstances and He also uses prayers to change our perspectives. I’d encourage you to prayer this prayer below (or your own version of it) DAILY. There’s nothing at all “magical” about these words, but there is something supernatural that can happen when we pray with faith.

[Read more...]

Where was God during the mass shooting? oregon shooting

Earlier this week, our nation was rocked by yet another tragic school shooting. A disturbed man walked into a writing class on the typically tranquil community college campus in Oregon and he opened fire. The wake of the disaster has created more debate over gun laws, more fear, and more questions like, “Where was God?”

[Read more...]

His 4 Biggest Needs, Her 4 Biggest Needs


My wife Ashley and I recently sat down with a couple who had drifted apart and they were desperately trying to reconnect as a couple. We guided them through some questions to help them get to the root of where their relational drift had started and how they could take steps to reconnect. They weren’t intentionally hurting or neglecting each other, and yet, they both felt hurt and neglected. Simply put, their needs weren’t being met.

[Read more...]

5 things God wants you to do today

mom kissing daughter

As a pastor, one of the questions I hear most often is, “What is God’s will for my life?”

[Read more...]

3 ways opposite-sex friends can hurt your marriage

man woman working

When I started the Facebook “Marriage” Page several years ago, my sole intention was to help build stronger marriages. The page is now wildly popular, but at first, there was little interest until my first “viral” post. I had no idea how much conversation and controversy I was about to stir up when I posted the following words…

[Read more...]

For the Unloved Wife

Worried teenager woman on the beach in winter

I receive thousands of messages online through the Facebook Marriage Page and my public Facebook page. Many of these messages come from people who are struggling in their marriage, and I try to do my best to provide some encouragement and insight to help with their situations. Yesterday, I received a message from a heartbroken woman who was reaching out for help. Her message broke my heart.

[Read more...]

4 excuses that kill a marriage

couple in bed frustrated

I’ve always believed that when we’re committed to something, we make a way, and when we’re not, we make an excuse! As I have interacted with countless married couples, I’ve seen that too many couples are staying stuck in a rut because they’re making excuses instead of making a way to strengthen their relationship. Below are some of the most common excuses I hear and how to replace the excuses with solutions. 

[Read more...]

9 things married men need to stop doing

Photo courtesy of

As I’ve interacted with thousands of married couples in person and online, I’ve noticed some bad habits many husbands are doing to sabotage their marriages. There are obviously many unhealthy behaviors many wives are doing too, but I’m going to focus this particular post on some of the most common and destructive habits of married men. This is NOT intended to bash my bros out there. I struggle with things on this list too. This is intended to be a call to action for all of us to step and make some radical readjustments for the sake of our marriages and families.

[Read more...]

10 books that could change your marriage

couple reading

One simple way to improve your marriage is to read good books (or listen to good audiobooks) on the subject. People often ask me to list my favorite marriage books, so I thought I’d put a few of my favorites below. Each of these has been a source of great encouragement in my marriage and I believe they could be a source of great encouragement in yours too. Just as a disclaimer, I’ve written several books on marriage, but this is NOT going to include any self-promotion. In fact, none of my books are in the list below. If you prefer listening to reading, all of the books below are available as a Free audiobook through

[Read more...]