STOP SAYING “homosexual lifestyle”

STOP SAYING “homosexual lifestyle” November 4, 2013

Stop it.

If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a million times but apparently it bears repeating on a daily basis because I still hear or read it a few times a day (sigh, maybe I should revisit my Calvin and Hobbes collection). There is no such thing a monolithic “homosexual lifestyle”.

So, unless you enjoy presenting yourself as willfully ignorant, stop using the term, no matter how well-meaning you think you are.

Stop saying it unless you are willing to step up and say what you really mean, that you are grossed out by the thought of two people of the same gender touching, embracing, kissing and fondling each other’s fine china.

See, when you say you can’t support the “homosexual lifestyle” you are talking about a lot more than what goes on in our bedroom. What you are actually saying is that you can’t support me getting up early to make breakfast for the kids and pack healthy lunches.  You can’t support me helping a tearful kid through a crappy math assignment or a teenager through a heart-wrenching bout of boyfriend woes. You can’t support me going to work and loving the job I get to do with colleagues I respect. You can’t support me paying taxes or voting for school board candidates who might actually make a difference in the lives of thousands of children.  You can’t support me singing “I’ll Fly Away” in church or tithing as much as we can scrape together each week.  You can’t support me delivering casseroles to friend who’s husband is recovering from a tragic car accident or making kick-ass chili (yes, veggie) for neighborhood potlucks.  And you sure as hell won’t support me as we escort my dad to his final resting place.

You also gotta be willing to admit you are uncomfortable with the notion of human equality and just good old fashioned compassion. You have to be ready to claim your resistance to loving your neighbor as yourself (oh wait…).

Friend, every time you utter the phrase “I can’t support the homosexual lifestyle” be clear that you mean that my family is not real. Make sure you clear your throat so we can hear you say that you believe my children are being raised by abominations and that in order to make you feel better we should break up our home and raise our daughters as single mothers or in sham marriages.

And biblically speaking, be exceptionally clear that you want me put to death.

Oh, but wait, you’ll also have to be willing to put your foul-mouthed kiddo to death too (Exodus 21:10).

Tell the truth – you only adamantly apply the bible verses that in no way ask you to adjust YOUR lifestyle.  If you actually had to live every jot and tittle of the bible literally you’d have to give up a LOT of possessions (Luke 12:33), figure out something besides ham (or cocktail weenies, depending on which way you swing) for your holiday dinners and decline every invitation to the Shrimp and Oyster Palace (Leviticus 11:10). You’ll also have to step away from that People Magazine in the check-out lane at the Piggly Wiggly (Leviticus 19:16).

You’d also have to throw a little Paul into the garbage disposal.

Romans 8:38-39
New International Version (NIV)

38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[a] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Yep, you’d have to deny Christ has liberated us from the minutia of man-made law and then admit that Grace is not free.

You are addicted to a lie.  You are addicted to a myth that relegates your neighbor to sub-human and a second class citizen.  You are addicted to the comfort of your own dysfunction.

My lifestyle, my life, my marriage will NOT destroy yours or anyone else’s.

Stop it.


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