Love, Joy, Feminism
A Review Series of Anonymous Tip, by Michael Farris
Last week we got to listen in on social worker Donna having lunch with her silver spoon soon-to-be lawyer boyfriend. Today we get to listen in on good-mom Gwen having lunch with dashing-lawyer Peter.
In the upper level of the Flour Mill, Peter Barron was anxiously awaiting the chance to hear the story of Gwen Landis. They got outside seats on the deck of Clinckerdagger’s Restaurant, an upscale establishment with an Old English motif. . . .
Their view of Spokane was quite different from that enjoyed by Corliss and Stockton, although they were only separated by a few hundred feet. They faced the southeast, with a magnificent view of the middle section of Spokane Falls and the maze of second-story skywalks downtown which enable both shoppers and business people to walk throughout the major portion of the downtown area and never go outside.
Eager to know the facts of the case, Peter begins asking Gwen questions.
The first thing, and this may seem out of order to you, but since you officially have another lawyer, I need to ask you about that to see if it is appropriate for me to undertake your case.
Um, didn’t they already go over this? I mean basically, Gwen said he wouldn’t believe her if she told him, and he said he would believe anything of Bill Walinski, and that was that. Must it truly be rehashed? Poor Gwen!
“To try to put it delicately, he offered to do my case for free from this point forward—my dad already paid him $500—if I would become his ‘cozy friend.’ I think that’s how he put it.”
Peter blushed and stared at his napkin on the table for a moment. “Wow. That’s unbelievable. Even for Walinski. Are you sure that’s what he meant?”
“I have no doubt whatsoever.”
“Boy. Well, like I said, with him I would believe almost anything, and while this is shocking, he is one of the few lawyers in town crass enough to make such a proposition.
WAS THIS REALLY NECESSARY.
I mean I guess it does at least lead up to this:
“When we get this all behind you, we need to look into a complaint with the state bar association.”
THANK YOU.
With this embarrassing interlude out of the way, Peter begins asking about the actual case. And, fairly early on, we get this:
“Did she say what she wanted?”
“She wanted to come into the house and talk with Casey. She didn’t say anything about strip-searching her—”
“Strip-searching?” Peter interjected.
“That’s what she and a partner did the next day.”
“Whoa,” Peter said. “This is going to be good.”
Eager Peter is eager. But here, at least, we get a foreshadow of what is to come—eager lawyer Peter will push back against the CPS and argue that their actions weren’t justified or legal, thus turning the tables and shifting the focus away from whether Gwen abused Casey.
When the waitress brought their food, Peter interrupted his questions to pause and say, “Gwen, is it okay if I give thanks?”
She was surprised but pleased. A praying lawyer, she thought. That’s different.
Because of course he did. I do have to say that when it comes to this kind of thing, evangelicals appear to have completely forgotten about Matthew 6:5-6.
In twenty-five minutes of careful interviewing, Peter Barron, Esq. learned more about the underlying facts than Bill Walinski knew after several days on the case and, more importantly, after having already conducted a hearing that had cost Gwen the custody of her child.
So far I feel like the moral of this story is less “CPS is out to get you” and more “getting a bad lawyer will completely screw you over.” But maybe that’s just me. In all seriousness, at this point in the story I do feel relieved for Gwen that she now has a competent lawyer.
Gwen asks Peter whether she has a chance. He says he thinks she does, but that things are going to be a bit uphill since she lost the first hearing. Gwen is relieved that he seems honest with her.
Peter finally brings up something absolutely no one else has even thought of up till now—Gwen’s ex-husband.
“Gwen, tell me about your relationship with your ex-husband.”
Gwen was taken aback. Because of the recent incident with Walinski, this was beginning to sound all too familiar. Her radar went on red alert.
“Why? What’s that got to do with this?”
Sensing her discomfort, Peter quickly replied, “Don’t worry, it’s not what you may think. There’s a strong legal reason for me bringing this up. Your ex-husband was entitled to formal notice of today’s hearing. In the helter-skelter of CPS’s effort to take Casey from you, they missed an obvious legal requirement.”
I’m wondering, how does Peter know that they missed this requirement? I mean we know, but that’s because we’re the readers. Couldn’t Gordon have been notified and then waived his right to appear?
Gwen was completely relieved. “Oh, that’s why you need to know. That’s fine.”
And so they talk about Gordon. Peter asks whether Gordon would ask the court to award him custody. He says bringing Gordon into the picture could help Gwen’s case if Gordon was willing to testify that she was a good mom, but could hurt her case if he did the opposite. He suggests that Gordon might be more likely to be on their side if they got to him first, rather than if “the judge suddenly remembers to ask about a father and sends CPS out to find him.” Gwen is unsure.
“When we got divorced, he did not contest custody at all. He has told me lots of times he thinks I’m a great mother. But he is still really irritated with me, so I’m not really sure.”
“Why is he so irritated with you?” Peter asked.
“He keeps dropping hints that he wants us to get back together, but he hasn’t changed in the slightest since the divorce. In fact, he’s gotten worse. He’s mad at me because I won’t even consider reconciliation. I might if I really saw a dramatic change in him. I haven’t really seen anyone else since the divorce. A date or two, but I’m not really ready for anything yet.”
“Gwen, why did you two get divorced?”
OMG. MUST WE. OKAY FINE CLEARLY WE MUST.
Gwen explains that it was about money, and that Gordon would rather chase dreams than keep a steady job, but that since the divorce Gordon has been unemployed and has taken to drinking, and is behind on child support. Peter says that a judge would be unlikely to give Gordon custody in those circumstances.
“We can use the failure to notify him as legal grounds to set aside this morning’s order. Then we can try to turn him into our witness to get him to refute the idea that you would ever bruise Casey. He could testify that he has never seen bruises on her during your marriage or during any of his visits.”
Peter adds that Gordon is only step one. He says that he wants to subpoena the second social worker, Rita, and the police officer who accompanied Donna and Rita, to see if Donna’s story holds up. He says he also wants to bring Casey’s doctor, Dr. Davenport, to testify in court, which he says will be more convincing than a simple affidavit.
Gwen smiled. This was aggressive. This man seemed like he really wanted to fight for her. But then, she remembered a problem area—money. “How am I going to pay you for all of this? I simply can’t afford to pay very much at all. And my parents went to their financial limit giving Walinski $500.”
Peter smiled and sighed a little. “You know, if it weren’t for what happened with Walinski, I would offer to do this for free. But you might suspect my motives if I did that. Here’s my best offer, take it or leave it. I will charge you $75 an hour for all the work after this lunch. This has been truly free. I won’t charge more than $1,250 for doing your case in Juvenile Court. I know that may sound like a lot to you. But here’s the kicker. You can pay me as little as $25 a month, and I’ll never charge a dime of interest. That way I figure I might get to keep you as a regular client in case anything else ever came up.
Not surprisingly, this does not placate Gwen. She wants to know why Peter is willing to make this offer. “Why are you being so nice?” she asks. “What’s in this for you?” Good on you, Gwen, good on you.
Peter looked at her. Something inside him wanted to sigh. She was indeed beautiful, and he had always been a sucker for a damsel in distress. He stared off at the river for a moment, and then turned back and looked her squarely in the eyes.
“Gwen, I’m trying to decide how to tell you this. Some of it’s a little personal.”
Gwen immediately thought he was going to tell her, “I’m gay.” She braced for the worst.
“Gwen, I’m a born-again Christian.”
This is really weird, she thought. Why is he telling me this?
Go Gwen, go!
“My faith is based upon the Word of God. And, as a side note, one of the reasons I want to help you is that the Bible says a lot about helping widows and orphans. But the Bible also gives a number of principles for daily living, which I do my best to follow because I want to please my Lord Jesus.”
It was all sounding like church camp, but Gwen continued to smile pleasantly and occasionally nodded in apparent understanding.
Pssst, Gwen! You don’t have to smile and nod!
“Because of my beliefs—I’ll explain them more to you some other day—you can be guaranteed I won’t be coming after you—at any time. I’ll treat you like a sister, nothing more. OK?”
But Gwen still doesn’t take this as an answer. (Good for you, Gwen!)
“Peter, I’m sorry. I really don’t understand. After all that’s happened . . . . You seem so nice, but this has been a strange day. I guess I just can’t take anything for granted. Why don’t you explain it to me now? About your beliefs or whatever it is.”
Oh, Gwen. Oh, Gwen, darling. You really don’t want to go there.
Peter began to wish he hadn’t opened the entire subject. He knew he wasn’t another Walinski, but in trying to prove it he had made a verbal mess of himself. But he mustered a smile and launched in.
“Gwen, it’s just this,” he said with a hush in his voice.
“I believe that the Bible teaches that as a single man I am unable to marry a woman who was divorced under circumstances like yours. Not all born-again Christians believe this. But I do. So because of that . . . ”
He paused for a moment, looked down briefly, and continued, “Because of that I would never begin to pursue a relationship with you. I would like to be your lawyer and your friend, but . . . nothing more. I shouldn’t’ have brought this all up. I just wanted you to know that you could trust me to do you a favor without an ulterior motive. OK?”
Yes. He really said all of that.
Gwen earlier said that she’s not ready for another relationship—she said that in the context of Gordon wanting to get back together, but her only being open to that if he changes. In other words, Gwen has already made it clear that she does not consider herself available. But it seems like Farris, as the author here, has this dichotomy in his mind between skeezy lawyer Bill Walinski who attempted to coerce Gwen into a sexual relationship and godly lawyer Peter Barron who must have a reason he can’t have a relationship with Gwen, so what Gwen actually wants isn’t all that relevant.
In other words, on some level there isn’t really any difference between Bill and Peter. The suggestion here is that Peter would pursue a relationship with Gwen, with all of the unprofessionalism that would entail, and in spite of the fact that she has already said she is not interested in a relationship, if he were not prohibited from doing so by his belief that her divorce disqualifies her as a marriage partner. Is it that hard for him to tell her he believes strongly in maintaining a professional lawyer-client relationship, and is simply willing to do some pro-bono work as a way of giving back?
Farris seems to think this was necessary for Peter to convince Gwen that he was not going to be another Bill. Instead, what it really showed was that Peter, like Bill, is willing to dispense with professionalism and be inappropriately intimate with his clients.
In case you’re curious, here’s how Gwen responds:
“OK, I guess. Just help me get Casey back. That’s all I want.” Gwen surprised herself at feeling a hint of rejection in what Peter had said. She couldn’t sort it all out but was relieved to find a lawyer who seemed to have a better idea of how to fight for her beloved Casey.
No, Gwen, that’s not rejection you’re feeling. That’s shock at your lawyer being so incredibly unprofessional as to tell you that his religious beliefs prevent him from marrying you, after you already told him you weren’t interested in a relationship, and when he knows full well that your previous lawyer attempted a relationship and you would probably rather not know that he, too, has been thinking about having a relationship with you in the first place. That’s what you’re feeling.
At this point Gwen notices that it’s 1:20 and remembers that she’s supposed to meet her parents and Casey at the courthouse at 1:30. Peter drops a $20 bill on the table and, as they head toward the courthouse, asks Gwen to “write down every single word and action you can remember about the two CPS visits to your home and bring them to me in my office tomorrow at 9:00 A.M. sharp.” I suppose this was before email, so I’ll give him a pass rather than assuming he just wants to see her again.
Peter could tell she was feeling better under his care. He liked it whenever a client expressed confidence in him. But despite his lecture about scriptural principles, something else mingled in his mind about this particular client.
See, I TOLD YOU.
Poor Gwen. She should be able to have a lawyer who doesn’t have the hots for her.
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